Friday, August 17, 2007

Adoption- A calling or a back up plan?

I'm just going to throw out the ramblings in my head so this may not make a lot of sense to anyone else but these thoughts have been rolling around in my mind for a while now. Recently I heard a radio announcement for a well know Christian Family Company that was speaking up about adoption. That's good right? Well... sort of- It's always great to get the word out there and remind people about children needing home. However.. The issue I have is with some people that promote adoption for the wrong reasons.

I do believe, at least from my experience, that adoption is, or at least should be, a calling on our lives from the Lord. When and how God calls you to adopt is usually a different story all together.

Recently I was listening to a call in radio show and a man called in very clearly upset and asking advice about him and his wife struggling for many years to have a child. Immediately their response was "Have you considered adoption?". My heart went out to the man as you could tell he was fighting both tears and anger. He responded with a shaky voice that this is the first thing people ask them. The caller got quiet and did not respond and that was the end of that call. It was the second time in 2 days that the radio program suggested adoption to someone struggling to have kids. I am not meaning to speak ill of the radio program as I know that they mean well. Sure it seems natural for people to blurt out "What about adoption?" to every family that struggles with having a baby. I think though of all the passages in the bible that share about the pain even then from not being able to have children physically. For many people it was not God's will for them to have a baby, and I think of Abraham who did not wait on the son God promised him and his wife but took the matter in his own hands miserably. What if many families struggling to have children are being ask to wait on God? What if He has plans of showing His glory through them by given them a beautiful miracle? Could God be growing them to use them to adopt? Sure, but He can use any of us. Why is it the first thing that is being spouted off to those who are struggling with the pain of wanting to bare their natural born babies? Why is that question only being asked of them by everyone. I wonder if many of these people giving them this advice, including large biological families, if they have turned to themselves and asked themselves and God in prayer "What about adoption?" with a willing heart if God were to call them in this way...as well as those who struggle with having bio children. Should they ask this question also? Yes... but not any differently then a family with 10 bio kids.

In my opinion it does not make any sense at all to single out those who are struggling to have children physically to ask this question. It would be like someone with a strong desire to share God's word and going out and doing anything and everything they can to reach their neighborhood and when they are not feeling as if they are reaching anyone they turn to people they trust to ask what more they can do and share their frustrations just to have everyone tell them-- "Well, if you are not seeing the results you want here why don't you move and try and reach people somewhere else?" I believe adoption is a calling as much as God sending his children to other countries to share His word. I do think there are so many people that God would be pleased to use for adoption that are not opening up their hearts and being willing to be used by God in this way. I encourage each of you reading this to ask yourself (if you have not already) if you have submitted yourself willing to consider adoption if God should call you to it, and asked God for an answer about it? Some He will use, and others he will have other plans for. So while I do love to share my passion for the children of Haiti and even just adoption in general- I truly don't want my posts or experience I share to ever just "tug on heartstrings" and encourage people to adopt if it is not part of God's plan for them, but only after much prayer and being sure it is God that is calling you to it and not me or anyone else putting the suggestions on your hearts.

I would love to hear in the comments section what others think of this. It's just been something eating at me for a while. Am I the only one that feels this way?

Much Love,
Angela

5 comments:

Heather said...

AMEN!!!!!! This is exactly how I feel. I truly believe adoption is a calling - much like full time missions or full time ministry. It really has NOTHING to do with whether you are physically able to procreate. Well said Angela!!

Becky Hinchley said...

I had never really thought about it, but you are completely right!

ManyBlessings said...

Angela,
I had honestly never thought of this before, but wow...you made an excellent, excellent point. The part that really convicted me was when you said, "Why is that question only being asked of them by everyone. I wonder if many of these people giving them this advice, including large biological families, if they have turned to themselves and asked themselves and God in prayer "What about adoption?" with a willing heart if God were to call them in this way...as well as those who struggle with having bio children. Should they ask this question also? Yes... but not any differently then a family with 10 bio kids."

I'm going to mull this over then bring it up on my blog. I need to quote you on this one if that's ok.

Excellent.
d

Angela said...

Thanks everyone that shared your thoughts with me on this. It's one of those things I wrote and then left the house for the day and thought "Maybe I shouldn't have shared those thoughts"... Now I'm glad I did.
Manyblessings- If you do post this question on your blog I would love to know what kind of responses you get to it. Would you please let me know if you do it?

Angelasparent said...

Angela,

Not only are you absolutely right in your thoughts concerning adoption being a calling, but it could not have been more clearly or more completely stated. It is so wonderful to see the Holy Spirit stirring you up to exhortation. I love you and am very proud of you.

Dad