Sunday, November 18, 2007

Paper Pregnancy Dreams


Okay my head is still a little fuzzy from trying to wake up and acknowledge that I really am awake and not going to be able to go back to sleep. I remember having some really strange dreams when pregnant with our bio boys. This morning I was having the most bizarre dream about our kids in Haiti. From what I remember it started out with Jim and I in the streets (on foot) of Port-au-Prince. We were trying to find the orphanage and I had assured Jim that since I have been there twice I could find it no problem (yeah right!) so we walked and walked and saw the strangest things along the way. My favorite strange thing was a taptap that had a McDonalds in it (I must be having paper pregnancy cravings in my dreams too)! It might not be too bad of an idea.

So, anyways we finally get to the orphanage and our kids are just inside (although it looked nothing like the real orphanage). We are so excited and can't wait to get to them. We kept trying different ways to get in and couldn't figure out how to get inside. One of my favorite ways was that the orphanage was suddenly this HUGE building with a tiny rickety spiral staircase going up the side of the building and just packed with people. We would climb our way up the tiny stairs and get off on a floor and walk around looking for our kids and we would see odd things like a large window where you could watch a surgery being done on one of the kids, which I watched a little of and it creeped me out just like it would in real life. We kept going on the huge spiral staircase and looking and looking on each floor. At one point I went in to a panic because I suddenly realized we brought our sons from America with us and I couldn't find them either so we climbed back down the crazy stairs as fast as we could and finally found our boys on the street (good parenting, right?). Then I noticed a normal door entrance on the other side of the building and thought Hmmm... lets try that. We walked right inside and there was no longer any crowds of people. We walked up a nice wide open staircase and it brought us to just one big room. This is where we would finally get to our kids, I was sure of it. We opened the door and it was filled with arts and crafts tables everywhere and we couldn't get past them. I went a little nuts and started to climb over the top of one of the tables. It was there while I was dangling from the top of the table that some adults waiting for the kids to come in noticed me and asked me what I was doing. I sat there crying and said "I can't find my kids". They asked me who our kids are and I told them their names. They got very excited and told me how much they love our children and that they would get them right away and bring them to us. "Really?" I cried out to them. I was suddenly so excited and relieved!!!! AND........I woke up. I never got to see the kids after all that. No, No, this isn't right I MUST go back to sleep! But, no, here I am typing.


So 3 questions:


1) What is your idea's about what my crazy dream means?


2) Is it usually near the END of pregnancy, paper or not, that you start having the weird dreams?


3) How can I make myself go back to sleep and hold those babies of ours? ;)


3 comments:

The Haiti Lady said...

I had the weird dreams before the kids came home as well. One, before we got Hunter, was us in the airport ...not sure which one, but someone came and gave us a baby, but he was WHITE. I said "our son Hunter is haitian, he is black." They told me "this is a cute baby, if you just hold it a while you will like this one too..." NOT WHAT I WANTED!!! I was so glad that when we got Hunter in Miami I told my hubby..."He IS black!" hehe
Love ya,
LeAnne

Phil & Linda said...

Angela,
I've heard (don't know if it's true or not) that it is the emotions you have in dreams that matter. If your feeling frustrated, or tired, or angry, or hurt, or happy, or sad, or etc.....it means those are the emotions you are experiencing in real life. So, if that's true, then your dream would mean that you are feeling like you can't quite 'get to' your kids. You're trying and trying (even putting yourself and bio kids at risk) to get to them, but things/happenings keep preventing you from actually getting to them. You're feeling frustrated, confused, angry, sad, and happy (when the people finally help you) during the whole process. But, in the end, you still don't have them.

Just my thoughts,
Linda

Angela said...

Linda- I was really hoping you would respond with your thoughts on this. I think you hit the driving force of the dream EXACTLY! Thanks so much!!!

LeAnne-- I'm glad Hunter came home black. ;) Aren't dreams amusing? I dreamed with one of our bio boys that they were born a pig and I kept losing him. I won't tell them which one and am still waiting to see if one of them will turn in to a pig and end up lost. One dream I'd like to NOT see come true! Glad I'm not the only one having the wiggy "about to become a Mom again" dreams! ;)