MAKE FUN OF YOUR DAY!

Luke (Tahoe 2010)

2010-06-25T18:43:00.000-07:00

Johnny (Tahoe 2010)

2010-06-25T18:09:00.000-07:00

Johnny loves to create things with his food. Can you guess what this is? If you guessed pac-man eating a dot while being chased by a ghost, then you nailed it! SOOOOOOOO Johnny!!!

Kyle (Tahoe 2010)

2010-06-25T17:47:00.000-07:00

Jacques (Tahoe 2010)

2010-06-25T17:34:00.000-07:00

Memorial Weekend 2010

2010-05-31T19:11:00.000-07:00

What an action packed Memorial Day Weekend we have had!

Friday~ We attended the college graduation of one of my dear Mother's Helpers. It was in the gorgeous Paramount Theater in downtown Oakland. We were so excited for her and loved looking around the theater. Afterwards we spent the evening at her graduation party.

Paramount Theater

Saturday was the night we had been long since preparing for. We hosted an event for one of our home school groups. It was a Minute To Win It themed party for around 50-60 people. It was an absolute BLAST and I'll share more details in it's own post soon (hopefully).

Sunday was spent at 2 services of church where we had so many wonderful opportunities to applaud, thank, and pray for many men and women who have or are serving our country. Followed by many hours of fun at the pool together. Afterwards we decided to all stay up all night playing together. Everyone made it except Luke. We played the game Sardines together in a pitch black house. So fun! For those of you that are not familiar with sardines it is like a backwards game of hide and seek. One person hides and then the group tries to find them. When you find them you must hide in the same spot with them without anyone seeing you. Then one by one the other players find and hide there too until you are all squished together in a tight place until the last person finds you. Fun fun!

Monday the kids started the day by decorating our front yard with flags. The rest of the day was spent resting, playing, and watching movies as we were all tired from the previous days of fun. By evening we threw a family Memorial Day party on our deck. We considered doing the traditional BBQ but instead opted to just order pizza. However, we at least honored the tradition a tad by ordering BBQ chicken on our pizza. ;-)

Act 1 Scene 2b

2010-05-22T20:32:00.000-07:00

It's A WONDERFUL Life!!!

2010-05-17T09:11:00.001-07:00

This weekend Kyle finished performing in his first play. It was a musical version of "It's A Wonderful Life" and Kyle played young George Bailey. He's been taking voice lessons through-out this school year and just BLEW US AWAY with his beautiful singing voice! His acting was top notch too and we were just beaming as he performed! It's so exciting that he has found something he feels really passionate about and is clearly gifted for. The drama team he acted with was made up of all home schooled kids. We got to know them and their parents so well while preparing for the play and have made some wonderful new friends. Below are some photos friends have shared with us from the play~

This behind the scenes photo is of grown up George with our your George

Buckets Of Easter Fun

2010-04-04T15:49:00.000-07:00

Silly Face Contest~ Easter 2010

2010-04-04T15:39:00.000-07:00

Smiles~ Easter 2010

2010-04-04T14:45:00.000-07:00

Jacques first Easter at home, age 17

Kyle, age 11

Johnny, age 9

Maizy is sure she's my child too so jumped up and sat on the couch where she saw the kids getting their photos taken. Yes, Maizy, we love you too!

Luke, age 6

Lovenie, age 5

Family Hike

2010-04-04T14:28:00.000-07:00

Home schooling has become increasingly popular. Along with that, home school social groups have become all the rage as well. No longer do home school families need to feel alone or that their children are missing out on socialization. We are part of 3separate home school groups and the opportunities to get together for play dates, classes, or field trips seems nearly endless! One of the things I love about how home schooled kids socialize is that they are mixed with kids of ALL ages.

Saturday we joined other home school families on a hike. It was so fun to see friends, make new friends, and have some outdoor fun together!

Prank You Very Much!

2010-04-02T09:30:00.000-07:00

Jim's toiletries hanging from the ceiling!

Jacques' toiletries hanging from the ceiling!

April Fools day Morning was very eventful in our house this year... especially for Jim and Jacques!

Jacques~ As you can see from above~ I hung his toiletries from the ceiling of his bathroom. I wrapped his toilet bowl with cling wrap, and rubbed oil on all the knobs, and toilet seat. Good thing I warned him that he might want to get up a little early on this day! He then went in to get his breakfast. When he opened the cupboard to get his cereal bowl ping pong type balls fell out at him. He then went to the fridge to get his milk where it happened again! Later on at school he took a binder out of his backpack and found that "someone" had wrapped it up a bunch of times in cling wrap and left a note in it that said "You have been pranked by aliens". I'm pretty sure he believed the note!

Jim's Morning~

Jim's morning of pranks began when he reached in the dark for his glasses (which he cannot see much at all without). He fumbled around with them for a while confused that something wasn't quite right. Could it be because "someone" had switched out his glasses for sunglasses? Once he found his real glasses he headed to the bathroom to put in his contacts, which he keeps on the counter. But, it wasn't there. He then saw that "someone" had taped a note to the mirror that was a prank "calling card" and said "You have been pranked by" and then gave the option of checking the cat, the dog, the fish, or the butler. Because there was a picture of a fish on it, and Kyle had just recently got a goldfish, I checked that it was done by the fish. Jim took this as a clue to where his things were hidden so ran downstairs to search around the goldfish. When he couldn't find it there he headed back upstairs to search the bathroom again to no avail. So he stood there for a moment thinking where else the fish may have hidden his things. Then he just happened to glance up and see his things dangling from the ceiling! Once he was able to get ready and headed out the door he found that his car was not in the drive way so he had to go on a hunt and found it on the cul-de-sac near our home. He also found that "someone" had TP'd his car! Once he cleaned it up and got in he found another prank "calling card" on the steering wheel. He turned the car on and found that "someone" had set his satellite radio to the Nashville station and left it on max volume (he is NOT a fan of country music). Off he left to hide out safely at work for most of the rest of the day!

Kyle~

Kyle had a somewhat unintentional prank going on for a few days leading up to April Fools day. He is in a play and April Fools Day just happened to fall on one of his drama days, and also the first time that they needed to show up to practise in costume. When I reminded him about it and he figured out the date he was SURE I was just messing with him. He spent a few days worried about if he should go in costume or not. He was still nervous when a friend picked him up for drama, especially when she was not in costume. I heard him ask her if it was REALLY costume day and she told him yes but she had just not put hers on yet. About a half hour later he called me and told me NOBODY there was in costume, sure that I had pranked him! The others were just not in costume yet because they were practising a dance routine, but later everyone ended up in costume (to his relief). Before leaving he was giving his Mama a bit of smack talk about how I couldn't prank him while he was away at drama. Oh son... how little faith you have in me! While he was getting ready I set an alarm on the cellphone I sent with him so that in middle of drama the alarm went off with a voice recording of me repeating "April Fools Kyle" over and over until he could get past his costume apron and into his pocket and turn it off. He was not as amused with that one!

All The Children~

I'm not ALL bad on April Fools day. I also try and make it fun and quirky! We have our meals backwards. We start with dessert and then have our dinner for breakfast, lunch for lunch, and breakfast for dinner!

I also usually hand out fun print outs before school. This year they got a word find puzzle that had April Fools Themed words. Only not ALL of the words were there. So once they finally find the words that are there the puzzle spells out "you have been pranked". I also gave them a "What will you be when you grow up" quiz. It seemed normal but when you looked up the answer it gave careers like Goldfish Wrangler and Popcorn scientist.

Lunch~

I threw the kids an April Fools Day Tea Party~ with a twist. They were expecting some sort of prank but were delighted when I poured their "tea" and hot cocoa came out of the tea pot!

More Fun With Kyle~

One of Kyle's chores is to unload the dishwasher. So while he was away at drama we had fun filling it with strange things~ paper plates, a shoe, some socks, Kyle's book and wallet, toilet paper, dvd covers, canned foods, toys, and more. He was totally surprised when he opened it!

Dinner~

Then finished up the prank day celebrations for the kids with breakfast for dinner.

More pranks for Jim!~
Jim just happened to get stuck working late (OR was he hiding out???). When he finally left work I asked him to stop by the store and pick up milk, and may as well pick up some wine while he's at it. I happened to know that the grocery store near us recently got busted for selling to a minor and lost their liquor license for a while. So now they card EVERYBODY! Armed with that information the following prank was able to happen~

Jim picked up the milk and wine and headed to the register. The person ahead of him offered to let him go ahead since he had so few things. When he got to the cashier he pulled out his wallet for the first time in the day (he keeps it in his briefcase and had no reason until now to use it) and found that it was taped shut with packaging tape! The cashier questioned him about it and he just shook his head and said "My wife really likes April Fools Day". The person now behind him and the cashier laughed. When he finally broke into his wallet he pulled out his ID and began shaking his head again because someone had placed a photo of an Ape over his photo! Once again... the cashier and other customer laughed! (I was going to put a picture of a hairy butt but decided to go a little easier on him).

Prank Flop~ One of the pranks that I read online I tried to do. The night before I poured a bunch of clear gelatin in a couple of the toilets (that I thought Jacques and Jim would use in the morning) and left it to set overnight. It didn't do much except that you could see the powder in the toilet. Jacques was worried it would do something to him so flushed it away before using. Otherwise it was a total flop.

I got mine~ Yes, I can no longer totally escape April Fools Day without being pranked too. With Kyle around I'm going to really be in for it from now on. In the afternoon I headed up to use the sink in my bathroom. When I turned on the water I screamed! Kyle had taped the sink just right so that it sprayed right out at me soaking the front of my skirt! He also hid some of my things, and covered lots of things in our room with tinfoil (pillows, door handles, alarm clock, and more)!!!

I think that perhaps even God wanted to make sure that we knew He was in on our crazy day because right before I took a sip of water out of my glass I found a dead moth floating on top!!

FUN DAY HAD BY ALL! CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT NEXT YEAR BRINGS!!!!!

You Can Sleep, But You Can't Hide!

2010-04-02T09:06:00.000-07:00

'Twas the night before April Fools and all through the house, children were hiding because they were scared of what might happen to them!

Hey kids~ just 'cause you woke up last year with drawings on your face, doesn't mean we'd do it to you this year too! (insert batting of the eye lashes and innocent look here)

On April Fools Eve we went to say bedtime prayers with our children and found them all hiding in hopes of sheilding themselves from being pranked in their sleep!

Luke put up a large lid and fell asleep behind it.

Kyle slept under their air hockey table with a large tub of toys in front of him.

And Johnny... well... Johnny we found inside an emptied out toy box!

1.5 Months Home

2010-03-21T18:05:00.000-07:00

One and a half months home and everything is going beautifully! Jaco is just a total delight! It feels so totally natural and normal to have him as a member of our family. The more we get to know him the more I continue to be amazed how much he is just like his Dad! Usually we just go about our day as if he has always been here but every now and then I'll look over at him and it will all hit me~~ He's REALLY here!!! His smile always makes me smile. He is a quiet, cheerful, helpful, respectful, and intelligent young man. His brothers and sister all enjoy him too. Since he has been here I don't believe there has been a single argument or misunderstanding involving him with the other children. Luke is crazy about him but would never admit it. ;-) Jaco is so cute and sweet with him. Johnny RUNS to hug him when he gets home from school and talks his ear off!

Some of our adventures since he has been home includes~ a big welcome home party, a couple hikes, skating at a rink (which he did GREAT at), seeing a movie in the theater, shopping, family movie nights and more. He's shown himself to be a protective big brother on our adventures. It just warmed my heart even more to him when I would watch him stop to help his fallen little brothers up while skating, or when he grabbed Luke and saved him right before he stepped in front of a biker on our hike. Just a really sweet addition to the family!

We thank God for the gift of our new beautiful son. To be chosen to parent a "child" as wonderful as this is nothing short of humbling.

Newspaper Blitz

2010-03-04T09:42:00.001-08:00

On the day that Jaco came home to us I talked with a Newspaper reporter that was interested in doing an article of our family. I thought they would just want to come to the airport and capture Jaco leaving the plane and joining his family. However, they wanted instead to come to our home. I thought this article would show up just in the 1 local paper but it has started popping up in newspapers all over the Bay area. One company owns 14 Bay area newspapers and it seems that they are putting the same article in several of their papers. There is no telling how many of them it will end up in. It's been funny to have people from different parts of the bay area come up to us or contact us and say "We saw you in our paper today". It's been fun to track it as much as we can. We've even heard from a friend that a link to our article was on MSNBC.com

We had seriously considered not doing the article but we wanted to do whatever we could to help keep anything connected to Haiti in the news so that people do not begin to move on with their lives and forget about their great need. So we prayed that God would use it for that purpose and so it's been fun to see how much He has mulitplied it far beyond what we expected!

Below is a link to one of the articles. In all of them the wording is the same but the photos change. So far we've seen the above photo, a photo of Kyle and Lovenie dancing around in the living room (to Kyle's horror), and one of me helping Jaco with some school work. I'm curious to know what other photos are showing up in the other papers as they took hundreds while here!

http://www.insidebayarea.com/search/ci_14438339?IADID=Search-www.insidebayarea.com-www.insidebayarea.com

Video of our story on the News

2010-02-22T18:58:00.000-08:00

A new definition of CUP cakes!

2010-02-16T18:43:00.001-08:00

Leave it to my uber fun Mom to send me a fun activity to do with the kids! We made a whole new definition of cup cakes today! Here is what we did... Break up the kids into teams of two~ Jacques and Luke, named Team Ja-uke. Brennah (one of my beloved Mother's helpers) and Lovenie, named Team Brenovie. And Kyle and Johnny, Team Kyohnny. Each team had a bowl (recipe says to mix in mug/coffe cup but easier to do in a bowl and pour in), a 1 TBSP measuring spoon (the only measurement needed), and a few ingredients. The teammates would take turns putting in their bowl the ingredients called out. Once all ingredients were added and mixed it was then poured into coffee cups (which I sprayed with pam spray just incase). These coffee cups were then put into the microwave for just 3 minutes. This part was super fun to watch (see video below) because the cake would rise way above the level of the cup and you were SURE it was about to topple over. Then the cup could be dumped over onto a plate, split in half and you have yourselves some chocolate cake for each team member! They had a blast making them and a blast eating them! Thanks Mom!!!

Team Ja-uke~ Jaco stirs in some cocoa while Luke cheers him on with a big thumbs up

Team Brenovie~ Brennah supervises while Lovenie stirs their batter.

Team Kyohnny~ Kyle mixes in the sweet stuff while Johnny waits for his turn.

All the teams working happily together!

Cup of Cocoa (cake) anyone?

Slip out of the cup, onto a plate, split, and serve

Take in the smiles!

We blasted the tops of them with some whipped cream and then it was time to dig in!!!

Below is a video of the kids crowding around the microwave to watch the cake grow out of the cup while cooking~

HOME!

2010-02-04T07:30:00.001-08:00

This is an area that people put up birthday and other signs as you enter into our neighborhood. Everytime I would see one I would think "One day I'm going to put up a welcome home sign for Jacques". That day has come!

We got to the airport and were in the waiting for arrivals area. When it was just minutes until the arrival I decided to get a picture of the kids holding a welcome home banner, balloons, and waving flags. Everyone else in the waiting area was real curious about what we were up to and a couple American Airline employees came over and asked us who we were waiting for. When I explained to them many of the other waiters cheered and were so excited for us. Then the AA employees totally surprised me and said "Let's get you to their gate!". We were so excited to be able to go and stand right where he would walk off the plane but we had just minutes until their arrival. They had to run and get us passes to get us through security. I had water bottles they had to run and dump out as well. When I asked one of the employees if he really thought we could make it on time he responded "I've gotten far less important people then you to the gate on time. Like politicians". I had a good laugh at that! It was something like out of a movie! It was a mad scramble to run with all the kids to the security area. Each of the boys had brought their own bags. I had a bag and a purse. We all had to get off our shoes. I think we took up about 8 bins!!! Then getting everything through the scanner was crazy enough until security told me I had to put our ballons through the scanner. I asked if that would pop them and they said they didn't know but we had to do it. So into the scanner I attempted with the balloons but they just kept flying back out and did not have enough weight to cause the belt to move. So the security guard grabbed someone elses bag and rammed it in to make it go. I cringed waiting for all the balloons to pop, but miraculously they made it to the other side. Once on the other side it was a mad scramble to get 10 shoes back on 10 feet, and gather back up all our things. By this time the plane had already landed and Jim called my cell phone. He excitedly told us he was there and about to get off the plane. I asked him to delay for a few minutes, which totally confused him. ;-) After gathering our things we all RAN to the gate and as fast as I could we scrambled to set everyone up with banner, balloons, and flags. Everyone waiting in the terminal just stared at us but we were on a mission. Then I called Jim and said "Okay, come out." I'm at a loss of word to describe what it felt like to see the man I love walk off a plane with the son we've waited so long for!!! From behind the banner we cheered and yelled for just seconds before we ran to him to give and get hugs. Someone sitting nearby took this photo for us afterwards~ we are thankful to have captured our first moments together!

Jacques immediately showed such excitement and kindness to each of the kids and the bond for all of them to him was instant! Everyone of us just adore him!!!

After gathering everyone and everything up we still had another exciting reunion. Jim's sister, Donna, and her family had shown up at the airport also to meet him. So off we went to introduce their new nephew/cousin to them. It made it all the sweeter to have them there!!!

It was around dinner time so we decided to all go have a bite to eat together before we all headed home. That is when I learned that Jacques had been sick to his stomach and also notice he had a bright red eye that was irritated and really hurting him. He sure isn't a complainer! I would have had no idea he wasn't feeling great if he had not told us. Then Luke started feeling sick, then Kyle, then Lovenie. Oh dear! Happy to report that they are all just fine this morning!

Welcome Home our dear sweet Jaco!!! It was one of the most wonderful moments in our lives to be able to finally bring him home. I've spent some time with Jacque in Haiti and KNEW that we would all adore him. However, having him here and really getting to see his personality and watch him interact with his new family~~~ we could not be any prouder of him! What a WONDERFUL person he is!!!

WE HAVE JACQUES!!!!

2010-02-03T06:38:00.000-08:00

Wow, what a whirlwind! After writing yesterdays post and sharing the joy that our son was going to be put on a flight... we started receiving news that he was NOT after all scheduled to be on a flight for that night! So this dragged on for hours... was he going to be on a flight or not? The later it got the more certain we were that we were right back to "maybe tomorrow". However, late into the night we got a very excited email from the orphanage director saying very clearly that our child had flown out of Haiti!!! However, we are supposed to receive a call from Department of State telling us when our child is going to be flown out of Haiti and where and when they will land. Hours later that call still had not come! Jim, Jim, and Debbie were met up with by the parents of another child expected to arrive. Together they all decided to take a chance to go to the Miami airport and walk around in hopes of finding out anything at all.

I was able to look up incoming flights from Port-Au-Prince, Haiti and saw that there was a flight coming in at 3 AM. With only that news the group of parents headed to the international flights concourse to see what they could find out about that flight. At this point it was way after midnight and there was nearly no one around. However, when they got there they were able to find someone with Department of Homeland Security. This person was able to look into the flight and tell them nothing more then the fact that there were for sure 6 orphans from Haiti on that flight. Our orphanage had sent out 5, but there was no way to know if that was them. Jim, Jim, Debbie, Marcy, and Jeremy ended up sitting in the airport ALL night in the hope that it may be our children. It was not until 6-7AM that one of the parents got a call with a question regarding the immigration paper work for their child, and then they were at last pretty certain it was indeed our children that came in on that flight! Just minutes from 7 AM they delivered the children to the waiting parents!!! Jim had called me to let me know when he had been told that Jacques would be brought to him in a few minutes. I asked him to call me again as soon as he had him. I then sat by the phone for 20 minutes waiting. When the phone rang I answered but instead of my husbands voice I heard a sweet voice say "Hi Mom"!!! That's when it hit me that he really is coming home! He really is here in America!!!! They had to go and finish up even more paper work and none of them had had any sleep so I have not heard anything again. I believe that they were planning to return to their hotel to attempt some sleep before checking out. We are hopeful that they will be on a plane this afternoon and should be arriving in San Francisco at 5:45 tonight! I will be taking all the kids and waiting with signs and balloons. So much to celebrate for this family today!!! By the way... we STILL have not received that call from the government to tell us that our child left the country, what flight he is on, and where we should go to receive him. God alone worked out all the details for us!!!

Speechless?

2010-02-02T13:01:00.000-08:00

Seems a lot of my recent posts begin with not knowing where to begin. It's tough to blog when you feel nearly speechless at how INSANE life has become! However... so much to share at the same time.

So here's the current deal, I am back home with our children that are already home but not with Jacques. I'll pick up from where I left off. Remember my very excited post about Jacques coming home? Well, that was Friday. We had received a call from Department of State telling us that Jacques had been approved to travel and was ready depart. They did not know yet what flight he would be on but said they would be calling us back with those details. That night we were up late taking care of last minute paper work and then tried to get in bed in case we got the call in the middle of the night and had to rush to the airport. We also got an exciting phone call from very close friends of ours, Jim and Debbie, that they too got the same call. They had made the decision to jump on the first plane to Miami in hopes of being there when their daughter arrived. We had talked often about how amazing it would be to one day pick up our children together, and were just blown away that it was really happening! The next day, Saturday, we were sure since he hadn't come in the night before that it would be THE DAY we would receive our son. Each minute of wait for that call felt like HOURS. By 4PM our friends arrived and it was a wonderful reunion. They, however, had only had 2 hours of sleep and little food so were starving.

We excitedly headed over to an airport restaurant to share a meal together. Just as we were giving our waitress our orders security came running through telling everyone to "Drop your food and evacuate the building". We grabbed our carry on's and nearly ran with everyone else out the front door and then were told to cross the street away from the building. It was crazy! We had no clue what was going on, and still do not know what happened. After a while of standing around outside watching the show of the search dogs and security, we were allowed back into the airport. Also, that weekend was the Pro Bowl in Miami so nearly every hotel room was booked and the few that were available were so because they were a small fortune to get into! While finally getting our meal we discussed the hotel situation and decided that we would all likely be having a bit of a pajama party at the airport together! However, we made some calls and found a room that normally would have been way more then we would pay but decided we could share the room and split the cost. This was great as we ended up with a nice room AND got a lot of time with our dear friends that we see far too rarely. So off to the hotel we went where we waited, and waited, and waited for the call that our kids were on a flight. That call never came.

Instead we received an email from the Director of the Orphanage who had spent the entire day at the Embassy and was told that our children WERE NOT approved to travel! WHAT??? But, the Department of State themselves were saying they wanted to make 100% sure we knew we were approved and that our kids would be traveling. We assumed it was some big misunderstand between the offices and were disappointed and confused. That night before going to bed Jim G. (my husband is Jim L.) had the brilliant idea of sending out a desperate plea to every government email we had a contact with, including DOS (department of state). We were once again encouraged the next morning when we woke up to an email from DOS saying that they checked and reconfirmed that our children were indeed CONFIRMED that they were approved to travel. We passed this email on to the director and he promised to return again right away to the Embassy. This was now Sunday. We waited, and waited, and waited. When we did reach the director on the phone he said the kids were waiting to have an identifying photo taken. Certainly this was a great sign! We continued to wait, feeling certain that this day really was THE DAY! It wasn't until late that night that we received a disappointing email from the director. He said he had spent the entire day at the embassy with children with him and they had accomplished nothing more then a one minute photo of the kids. :-( Not only did we feel totally deflated but we felt so badly for him as that has to be so very frustrating! The rest of his email really crushed us! He said he was sincerely sorry for the misunderstanding and for our time and travels but told us our children would not be traveling right away... maybe by next weekend. We could not hang on that long. We realized we needed to go ahead and book flights for the next day and return home without our children. We felt totally defeated. There were quite a few tears until we gathered together in prayer. We knew for sure that there was a reason God had us there, that it had not all happened for nothing. After that we had received another email that had us very excited again! One of those emails that we had blasted out to every government office we had access to was the Department of Homeland Security. They responded and told us that they were contacting the embassy to attempt to get ALL the New life Link and Hope for the children of Haiti processed to leave the country. This was the answer to our big prayer! Not, just bring OUR children home but bring ALL the children home!!! We were renewed with hope and excitement, and a new focus!
We then began to excitedly discuss the possibility of getting into Port-au-Prince, Haiti so that if they do get the appointment we would be there to help with all the children. We prayed and prayed asking God to make it clear if that was HIS plan and not just ours. We prayed for a clear sign of what we were to do... hang on in Miami, try to get into Haiti, or go home and wait from there (because it could also drag way out).

Monday morning I woke up before everyone else and decided to head to the hotel business center and search for tickets to Haiti. I saw breakfast being served and decided to stop and grab a hot tea to take with me. On the way to get my tea I spotted a group of people and nearly froze in place. I couldn't believe what I was seeing! We had asked for a sign and I thought this could very well be it! However, I was tired, a mess, emotionally worn out, etc. and suddenly felt very shy (YES, me shy!). I didn't feel up to approaching this group of people but felt God was leading this. I struggled in my mind arguing in prayer that it was a crazy thought to approach them but God kept urging me on and assuring me that HE placed this group of people there and it would be wrong for me to miss out on what He had for me. So I made myself walk up and begin talking to these strangers. The results were some somewhat inside information regarding the adoption situation in Haiti that was coming from an extremely reliable source! Information that implied things were happening to speed things up that most people would not have been aware of. Information that there is NO WAY I would have learned of it had it not been for this source!!! Sorry to be vague but there is a reason I won't share the exact details. I rushed back to the room to share the news with Jim, Jim, and Debbie. This just sent us spiraling right back into the "WHAT do we do now???". I really felt strongly that this was the sign we had prayed for, but as a group we decided that it just wasn't enough to warrant us hanging out in Miami longer without more solid and certain information. We looked and looked for a way into Port-au-Prince, Haiti and just couldn't find one. It was settled. We would return home. I had ZERO peace that this was what we should do and continued for hours campaigning for us all to hang on longer in Miami! I really believed something was about to happen!

It did get to the point though that it seemed clear that I would need to return home that evening to take over with our children at home. I was WAY bummed to be returning home without Jacques. The original plan was for all 4 of us to head home but as we talked it through more we decide that Jim L. (my husband) was going to go ahead and stay behind in Miami. He was all prepared to live in the airport for as long as it took to receive our son! I was SO proud of him. We headed off to the airport and said sad goodbyes to Jim and Debbie as they headed to catch their flight. While in line to get my ticket I was constantly holding back the tears. Not only was I leaving without Jacques but I was also now leaving without my best friend/husband. The idea of him living in the airport without a safe place to sleep was no big deal to him, but I hated the idea of it. I did, though, believe we were doing the right thing. Despite being told that Jacques would not likely travel this week, I just KNEW it would happen very soon! We stood in line to get my ticket for about 45 min. Just as there was only one person left in front of us Jim G. called and told us that they had JUST received the phone call that their daughter was FOR SURE ready for travel! We were so excited for them and so torn about what to do, because our son was likely going to travel with her. Then as we became the first in line, our phone rang and sure enough... Jacques too was for sure approved to travel!!! So Jim was still on the phone with DOS when I went to the counter. The agent asked me where I was headed and I could only respond "I don't know!!!". Should I get on the plane? After waiting all those days for Jacques could I just go home and miss his arrival? Was there someone else that might take over with watching our kids so I could be there? So for the next hour we threw around ideas about what to do. Jim and Debbie had made their decisions and canceled their flight and rejoined us. They now planned to stay until they received their daughter. After much debate we decided that our children had been in the care of others for too long (even if those who were caring for them were amazing) and the right thing to do would be for me to return home. Minutes later I was saying my goodbyes to Jim, Jim and Debbie. I was torn between great joy over the good news and heavy sorrow over having to leave and not be there when he came.
So now it is Tuesday. While at first I was so sad to have to leave I am now happy to be home. I missed our kids so much after 8 long days away from them! However, the wait continued. As of this morning we had heard that 3 other HFC kids were confirmed to travel out of Haiti tonight but our kids were still waiting to be confirmed. It was while I was writing this novel of a post that Jim called me and told me that our son will be flying to the US tonight!!!! Along with our friends daughter, 2 of the children of another one of my closest friends, and 5 other children from the same orphanage!!!!!

So MUCH celebration tonight!!! Hours from now our son will be in the care of my husband and, Lord willing... tomorrow he will be in my arms!!!!!

Disappointment

2010-02-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

Getting ready to travel home without our son! We've had so many ups and downs over the last few days and it's a long story so I'll update when I get home. Jim is staying behind and will literally be living at the Miami airport waiting on our son. Details to follow. Please pray for all involved.

He Is Coming Home!!!!

2010-01-29T20:22:00.000-08:00

Today, Friday the 29th, we exited our cruise ship and headed to the airport. We were so disappointed that we had not received any information at all about Jacques, and most certainly were not called to leave the cruise to get him. So off to the airport we went. Our flight home was schedualed for 2:55. We managed to talk American Airlines into moving us to standbye on the latest flight tonight instead. Just minutes before we were getting ready to go through security and check in to our flight, we got a phone call from a friend that informed us that over 100 Haitian children were confirmed to be flying out of Haiti tonight or tomorrow.

Now, we had no reason at all to believe that our son would be one of them, except that his orphanage director had an appointment at the embassy today. With that information alone we chose to take a chance and stay one more night. After checking into our room we headed for a late dinner and at 9:15 PM received a call informing us that Jacques had his papers and was ready to depart from Haiti! We do not know when exactly he'll be arriving (or even if he'll for sure come to Miami, though it is the most likely place). They simply told us they would call us back when they knew what flight he would be on. We are expecting it could be tonight or tomorrow!!! I'll update as soon as possible. Hopefully my next update will include news that he is with us! As for now... I'm off to bed where I am sure to toss and turn until that blessed phone call comes in!!!

Bondye, Souple Pote Petit Gason Nou Lakay!

2010-01-23T11:38:00.000-08:00

Translation~ God, please bring our son home! We hope to have him with us sometime this week!!!!

Can you hear it?

2010-01-22T08:55:00.000-08:00

It's the sound of HUNDREDS of adoptive families being reunited with their children! Every day more and more children are coming home!! The DHS has claimed that they will have all 600 orphans that will be coming to America home within the next 10 days (and that was yesterday, so 9 now!). A few of the children from the partner orphanages New Life Link and Hope for the children of Haiti have come home. Many more parents are waiting to hop on a plane at any moment to see their child! Lots of good news coming out of Haiti for adoptive parents!!

Every day we wake up with the thought "Jacques could be home today" and can hardly believe that it could be true!!!

We thank you all so much for your outpouring of prayers and support! We ask that you would please continue to pray that Jacques would be safe and healthy while he waits for his turn to board a plane and come home to us.

Meanwhile, we have non-refundable airline tickets and cruise tickets. We are supposed to leave this Sunday! We have been so torn on what to do. Do we stay home and near the computer so any word that comes through we can jump on a plane, or do we go ahead and go and fly out from there if he comes. We keep going back and forth on what to do. Part of me feels guilty going on a cruise when there is so much hurting in Haiti. Even at home I have been having feelings of guilt to even drink water or eat food. It makes me wonder if Jacques is thirsty or hungry. When I snuggle in my soft warm bed at night I wonder where he is sleeping. If he is comfortable, if he is scared. How much more so will I likely have those emotions on a cruise no less! On the other hand, our family has been through and extremely stressful and traumatic time over the last year and a half. I'm just worn out and concerned that my husband and I continue to strengthen the wonderful bond we have. It could be so great to have calm and quiet time alone together before jumping back into the adjustment and bonding. So as of now... we plan to go. One of the big factors in the decision is that our cruise leaves from Miami, FL. and travels along into the Bahamas so we will be very close to Haiti. Three out of the 6 days we plan to be gone we'll even be in Florida which is the most likely place he'll fly into!!! We've checked with the cruise line and learned that leaving at a moments notice should not be a problem. Checked the airlines to see that getting a flight shouldn't be a problem and I've checked with our cellphone company and learned that we will have access to our phone calls and text messages at all times. We've arranged with a friend to check our emails for us and text us or call if there is anything there we should know about! We've decide to go for it! What we predict may happen is that he will come home after we have been on the cruise a couple of days, but there is no way to know for sure. The only thing that is fairly certain, Lord willing, is that this is sure to be a happy and exciting week! Either we will be on a cruise getting refreshed right before our new family adventure begins or we will be reuniting with our dear Jacques. We can't wait to see how it all comes together!!!

Horror, Heartache, and HOPE!

2010-01-20T07:50:00.000-08:00

My mind and emotions are just overwhelmed this week so again, I just almost don't even know where to begin! As an update on our 17 year old Jacques and his friends... They are still in Port-au-Prince. They are able to access the courtyard to their orphanage building so are there with each other by day and then returning to the basketball/soccer field at night to sleep away from the buildings (so that they don't have to worry about collapsed walls while they sleep!) A friend to the kids and to us that lives in Haiti checked on them and reported that they are doing well! We even got to see pictures of some of the kids laughing and smiling. She reported that they have food and water (that we all need to pray does not get looted, as that is happening in other orphanages) and are talking, playing, and doing each other's hair by day. This was a great relief to us parents! While it is still not a good or safe situation. You may be seeing some orphanages getting their children home on emergency visas and humanitarian parol. This is wonderful and we rejoice with them! However, HUNDREDS of orphans and even legally adopted children remain stuck there. Problem is... The directors of the orphanages arrive at the Embassy to get the visas and are turned away! If they show up with the children (which is how the fortunate few have gotten theirs) they put all the children in a very dangerous and unpleasant situation. Here's why~ The Embassy is just overwhelmed! Imagine finding a way to transport (through the demolished streets of Haiti)and take 50-120 children with you to an extremely overcrowded government office (as in pouring out of the door, gates, and well into the streets), with little help. Then imagine being there all day and all night with no food or water for yourself, your help, or your children. And OH, by the way... there are no toilets for the children to use either! Meanwhile... make sure you don't lose any of the children in the shuffle and the crowd. Also, the Embassy is in a dangerous area of Haiti. Orphange children are at high risk of kidnapping because there is a chance they are the child of a "wealthy" family from another country that would pay nearly anything to get their child back! Then imagine going through all of the trouble of making this happen and then being TURNED AWAY! It's just totally outrageous! This folks, is what is happening. We NEED your help immediately! Please write your congressman, senator, and anyone else you can reach! These children need to leave the country immediately for medical care, food, water, and safety. Also, it will allow any still functioning orphanages to bring in the overwelming number of orphans now needing help due to the earthquake! JSCIS had been trying to get the US government to approve the children to all be flown to the US to a compound area they had all set. The kids could receive medical help, food, and water there while the paper work is processed... in safety! However, it was DENIED! What we are seeking now is that President Obama would make an executive order to have the kids taken to a safe place to be processed!

While writing these very words I have just learned that early this morning Port-au-Prince was once again hit with a 6.1 "aftershock"! There is sure to be more grieving and damage. So sad. Just SO sad! Praying for the people of Haiti, and for our children who are there!!!
Each morning we wake up thinking our son Jacques could be home today! Then by the end of the day we must change our thinking to "Maybe tomorrow". However, as more news is coming out we fear that it could turn into weeks and we are in need of a miracle! What we need... #1- Prayer! The God that parted the Red Sea is the same God that can get those kids on a plane!!! #2- Our government to step up! We are hugely thankful that they have promised us our kids can come home, but disheartened that they would not help in the efforts to actually make it happen!

I'll try and update soon. Already in the time that it has taken me to write this post, things have changed and I want to go see what news is coming out of Haiti regarding this aftershock. Keep your prayers going! Haiti is in such need!!!

Devastation in Haiti hits us at home

2010-01-15T12:33:00.000-08:00

Whew... where do I even begin? Surely, an ocean of tears have been shed from our home this week! As many of you know we have two of our teen adopted children in Haiti right now. We received word quickly that Stephanie and the family she is living with is safe. However, we went about 7 LONG hours before hearing that our precious 17 year old son Jacques had survived! We know there are many other families still waiting and wondering about their loved ones and our hearts go out to them and our prayers are with them. So we praise God for sparing the life of our Jacques, however, he is not at all in a good situation. From what I understand their building has been basically destroy (though not collapsed) and is unsafe and unusable so the kids (Jacques and over 50 or so other teen orphans) are living/sleeping in an outdoor basketball court. When I explained things to our son Jude (age 12 and adopted from Haiti) he knew about the place and shook his head and said "That place is VERY dangerous". Needless to say that did not bring any comfort. I do not have information on if they have had food or water since Tuesday. This morning we rejoiced as we learned that they had been reached and rescued, only to later find out that we were mistaken and they have not yet been rescued. Please keep our sweet son and the children from his orphanage in your prayers while you pray for the people of Haiti! He has been our son legally since August but we were waiting on a passport and visa to bring him home. So we cannot get him into America! I've contacted our congresswoman and researched and research on ways we might be able to get an emergency visa of some kind. Problem is~ Haiti has no working government. Probably won't for a long time. So there is nowhere to even take him to get a visa. Hundreds of adopted families are in the same situation with us. Also, we are hearing that adoption related issues are way down on the list of priorities. Understandably the first order of business is getting help out to those who need it the most. We will continue to seek options and pray for miracles!!!

We also must comfort Jude (Lovenie is not able to understand what is happening) as he also does not know if his birth family has survived. He asked me "What about my Mom and Dad, my Aunts and Uncles, and all my cousins" and I have no answer for him. I can only hug him and pray with him.

I have not posted anything here yet about this additional painful situation in our home, but we are also in the heartbreaking situation of seeking a family to re-adopt Jude. Information has come about that makes us certain we can not continue to raise Jude and Lovenie in the same home. Jude has been with us almost 1.5 years now and to say we have bonded with him and fallen in love with him is a huge understatement! We have prayed and prayed about this. We are so in love with Jude that I have even begged and pleaded to God that there would be some way, any way at all that he could remain here with us. God has confirmed again and again that it cannot happen, and is not His plan for Jude. We have been physically ill and sobbing over this situation. It is one I wouldn't wish anyone to find themselves in! Jude will be leaving us this weekend and will be a couple thousand miles away with very dear friends that we trust. It is a great comfort to know that he will be staying with them. We know that he will really enjoy them and they will enjoy him as well. They are not strangers to him and neither are their children, but are considered family to us. We do continue to seek a permanent family for Jude. So please pray with us about this and share information with families who are interested in an older child adoption through adoption disruption. We intend to keep the reason "why" private but will disclose everything to a family considering adoption. Jude is able to bond. He is so kind and extremely funny. ANY family that receives Jude as their son will be so blessed and so thankful to have him in their life. We praise God and thank Him again and again that He would allow us to know and love Jude the way that we do. We'll always be thankful for the role God has called us to in his precious life. God has confirmed to us multiple times that He "knows the plans he has for Jude, plans to prosper and not to harm, Plans for a future and a hope". We take comfort at that even as we cry until we run out of tears over saying goodbye to him.

Our Shining Star

2009-12-10T23:54:00.001-08:00

Last night was a big night for Kyle! He sang his first ever solo in front of many people. He chose to sing A la Nanita Nana, a Spanish song, as a surprise for his Spanish speaking Grandpa. He did such a great job and we are so proud of him! We hope to see him do it many more times!!!

Where We Have Been....

2009-12-07T08:20:00.000-08:00

I can't believe so much time has slipped by that I have not blogged! We've had many things going on~ both exciting and difficult (such is life). Since I'm so far behind I'll skip some of the photos and maybe try and find time later on to post them. In the last month or so, here are some of the highlights of what's been happening around here~

We finally got that home school day field trip to Monterey Bay Aquarium! The kids were so excited! It was a gorgeous day and we enjoyed a picnic lunch on the beach and the rest of the day exploring the Aquarium. It was a wonderfully memorable day for me and the kids.

Unfortunatley it ended on a very bad note. We stopped at McD's before our couple hour drive home to pick up dinner. As unbelievable as it seems... an employee slipped a roofies into my drink and then held up our meal a long time waiting for it to kick in. It was an awful, shady, creepy weirdness going on during that time that left me and my children in a very bad situation. What I believe is truly only by the grace of God we managed to get out of there. However, I was totally out of it from being drugged and had no idea really that I was out of it so I drove the remaining 1.5 hours home that way. Within 5 minutes of reaching home I passed out and didn't come to until 10 hours later. It was awful awful awful dealing with the medical field afterwards. Then dealing with the police investigation was equally as frustrating! Perhaps sometime I will blog about the experience. It was pretty scary stuff. This came at the end of other big family struggles and disappointments. Admittedly it was the breaking point that sent me into a real funk for a while (hence the lack of blogging). But God is good and doesn't allow us to pout for long. ;-) He knows when we need a "pick me up and dust me off" and then he sends it in bucketfulls!

Other unblogged excitements are~
*All the children are now home schooled. It was a tough adjustment for the first 6 weeks or so and I wondered if I were making a big mistake. Now that we have all fallen into the new routine I am thrilled to have them all home. They are all doing excellent. Luke has started 3rd grade so now all 4 boys are sitting at laptops to do their work.

*We got an adorable new kitten named Oreo. He is so cute, yet such a trouble maker, but we love him. The kids went bannanas when I went out for milk one night and came home with a kitten!

*Halloween was much fun this year. It started off the weekend before when we all went to a costume dance party for home school families. The kids had a blast dressing up and dancing the night away! Then on Halloween it was time to put the costumes back on and head out to dinner and then pounding on doors to score some candy.

*Kyle turned 11 on November 7th. Yet, it seems like he turned 13. We can't beleive how grown up he seems all the sudden. For his bday we hit the road and had a pizza party with my parents to celebrate Kyle's bday and theirs as my Mom's bday is on the 14th and my Dad's is on the 19th.

*Thanksgiving threw us for a bit of a loop. We were hosting it at our house this year and were expecting a few of Jim's siblings and families and my parents. However, the very day before Thanksgiving 4 of us ended up with a flu/cold! We felt so bad for everyone we had invited because we didn't want to get them sick and yet didn't want to make them have to make very last minute plans either. It all worked out well though as we were able to deliver half of the already purchased food to Jim's siblings and they met at a different house together. My parents decided to brave getting ill and came anyways to help with the cooking and cleaning. We spent it in PJ's, eating, and watching movies together.

*Jude turned 12 on November 27th. Can you believe it? We can hardly wrap our minds around it! He had a really nice celebration (even though half the family was still sick). The day of his bday was pretty mellow and included birthday cake and presents. The day after we took him to a roller skating rink for the very first time. We signed all the kids up for lessons before skating through a session. Jude caught on really fast and him and Kyle just loved it. Hopefully we'll be able to take them more often.

*Kyle and Jude both had their very first basketball game on Saturday. They are off to a great start with a win! I'm so thankful that they ended up on the same team. It's fun to watch them play at the same time. I've seen it build between them a teammate type attitude that is way better then what a competitive situation would have likely created. The two of them have struggled in their new relationship in the last year and it is so neat to watch that change.

*We are hiring a Mother's Helper! I'm thrilled about this. It has been a year of trials and joys unlike anything we could have imagined. Truth is... after all the excitement I am feeling a bit run down. So we will be having a Mother's Helper coming in twice a week to assist me with the cleaning, cooking, and childcare. We are planning on (Lord willing) doing this for the next 2 months or so in hopes that I'll have a chance to catch up and recharge a little!

*We are going on a CRUISE!!! OKAY, I can still hardly believe it is happening!!! A couple months ago Jim and I saw an online ad for a cruise that lead us into looking at different cruises. We dreamed about how great it would be but discussed also how unlikely it would be that we would be able to get away like that until many many years from now~ when our kids are much older or even grown. During their stay over Thanksgiving my Mom dropped an unexpected and wonderful bomb on us! She offered to come and stay with all the kids and let us get away together for my birthday and our anniversary next month! I was stunned. Jim and I both knew right away what we wanted to do and it didn't take us long at all to purchase tickets for a cruise in the Bahamas!! I'm so excited I can hardly stand it!

So there it is~ a sampling of just some of the many many many things going on around here. I'll try and update more often. ;-)

Spontaneous Adventures Strikes Again!

2009-10-26T01:09:00.000-07:00

It was a Monday just like any other Monday (except maybe that it was also the first official day that Jude was beginning home schooling again). The usual plan for a Monday was in place.... Start the kids on school, take Lovenie to speech therapy, finish school, and then chores. However, at 9AM we got an email from someone that told us that they had 8 tickets for that day to the Monterey Aquarium and we could have them for FREE if we wanted them! Jim had just returned home from working a very long all night shift at work. He was kind enough to stay awake and drive the 40 min. drive each way to pick the tickets up for us while me and the kids SCRAMBLED around to pack for an outing. I had to leave in about 1 hour to have Lovenie at speech therapy. Because Jim had been working really long and awful hours we decided to stay overnight so that he would have a quiet house to sleep in when he was home. We worked as a team and had the car packed up and Lovenie to her appointment on time. Jim met us there with the tickets so that we could leave straight from there. It wasn't until then that we really looked at the tickets and had some concerns. Jim decided to call the Aquarium and just make sure there would be no problem. Sure enough... the tickets were in someone elses name and could not be transfered. :( We were so bummed to break the news to the kids knowing how very excited they were. We figured since we were all ready packed up we should come up with another fun plan and still head out on a trip. So only about an hour later Jim was at last asleep and the kids and I were on our way to the very gorgeous beach town, Half Moon Bay!

The plan was to take the kids to one of the many elaborate Pumpkin farms there. The prices for their attractions are really spendy~ especially times 6 people. So I had prepared the kids to pick out just one or two things and that would probably be all we would do. When we got there and mentioned that the kids were home schooled (obviously school age kids there during school hours) they decided to give us the rate they give schools for field trips. It was CRAZY cheap all day passes. We were thrilled!!! Not only did they get to do everything but they got to do it as much as they wanted. Our time together at the farm was nothing short of magical and we even took a moment to stop right in the middle of that pumpkin farm and pray a prayer of thanks to a God that constantly blesses us beyond what we would even think to ask for!

Gotta love a place with potty humor!

As usual Luke wants NOTHING to do with animals, so he just stands around looking cute while his siblings go crazy over feeding the goats.

The others had a blast with them. Lovenie used to be terrified of any animal a year ago, but got right in there with them until one of the goats mistook her hair for food and gave it a nibble. That was the end of her goat adventures.

Lovenie's very first time on a pony

Johnny was pretty much bored right away. I guess after more then 55 visits to Disneyland last year he has become accustomed to a bit more thrill factor.

Cowboy Jude LOVES any time on a horse.

Train ride~

Bouncy Fun~

Just chillin' on a snack break

A VERY exciting Hay ride. It was POURING rain outside while we were on this covered hay ride and then stopped when it was time for us to get out

This is Johnny BEGGING me for a slice of pumpkin pie. Not only is it nearly impossible to say no to his big blue eyes but Johnny is such an easy going kid that he almost never asks for anything, much less BEGS for something. I didn't give in and buy him a slice.... I bought him a WHOLE PIE. You woulda thought he won the lottery the way he wigged out!

Just being precious

Hours of outdoor fun had us all tired and hungry so, after checking into our hotel, we headed off to this quirky restaurant for a refill.

I LOVE eating out with our kids. It's as if they put on their absolute best manners. They were so quiet and funny. They were sharing with each other and just being so sweet.

Outside of the restaurant is this gutted out double decker bus which now serves only 1 purpose~ to be partied in. It was empty and the kids asked if they could go in it and play. I told them to go wild and OH BOY DID THEY EVER!

Swinging from the rafters? We've done it!

Once we were all officially worn out we headed back to the hotel. It was one of those days that everything just came together so perfectly and you could hardly wrap your mind around it all. Included in that was that we were able to get a 2 bedroom suite for only $15 more then a regular room, making 1 adult traveling with 5 kids no problem!

Enjoying the begged for pumpkin pie while staying up late to watch a movie.

The hotel gave us a late check out so we were able to finish school and have lunch before leaving.

Next stop was to a different pumpkin farm to check out it's monstrous hay maze. We had heard legends of it but... WOW! It was so cool!!!!

It was fun and maddening at the same time. Nearly every way you turn looked the same as the last place you had been. Yet, it went on and on and often circled you right back to where you started.

The kids and I were determined as we laughed, played, ran, and took turns deciding which way to try next.

Every now and then we would come to these huge clearings and the kids would run around in circles

We came to many dead ends.

Around 45 minutes into our search most of us rested.

Except Jude who rolled around in the hay

and entertained us with flips and hand stands

After almost an hour and a half of searching for a way out Luke (6) and Lovenie (5) had decided they had reached their limit. I had also discovered allergies to Hay and was a bit miserable. The older boys were so very disappointed because they were determined to find the end. I agreed to let them continue if they stayed together and promised to leave out an emergency exit (which were everywhere) if they needed to come out.

Luke and Lovenie stay out of the wind while snacking in a hut.

About 20 minutes later the boys exitted out an emergency exit. Only one of the boys wanted to give up so they all came out with him but the other two were so disappointed. While waiting on the boys I had watched many families giving up and leaving the maze out of the emergency exits also. There was just one group of kids that I watched run in and out of the maze again and again exitting out of the actual exit. Before leaving I went to them and asked them to take us through and show us how. No joke... we were out in 5 minutes!!! Turns out there was a trap door that you had to know to look for and it is the only way to get to the path that gets you out. We just took the maze at face value and tried to work through it. I was so glad for the boys that really wanted to complete it that we were able to get it done.

We couldn't very well go and stay in a beach town without any beach time so despite the sun setting and the cold we hit the beach before leaving.

Lovenie really really does not like being "coooowwwd"

Me and my carribean sweethearts bundled up and watched the waves while the native California boys played in the waves and came back wet and happy.

What wonderful memories!

Summer Staycation Part 2

2009-10-17T10:52:00.000-07:00

The second child to choose our staycation outing was Johnny. He chose to go to Ripleys Believe It Or Not in San Francisco at Fisherman's Warf. The weather was just lovely and we made a lot of wonderful memories!

Is that an escape convict from Alcatraz behind them? No wonder why they're scared!

Jude with the king of Pop

Kyle with the king

Can you make this face? (Johnny)

Kyle

Jude

After our many fun Believe It Or Not adventures we finished off the outing with lunch at Fisherman's Warf where you can find THE MOST delicious fish and chips and shrimp and crab cocktail. Then we walked the short distance to sit ocean side in the sun while enjoying our feast. We sat right near a Jamaican band and totally enjoyed the music while Lovenie danced for everyone.

Videos posted below~

Video 1~ Lovenie dances to the live music at Fisherman's Warf

Video 2~ Do you DARE reach in the mouth?

Video 3~ Jude takes the shocking Hot Seat

Video 4~ Johnny takes the challenge in the Hot Seat too

Video 5~ Jim shows them how it's done and holds on to the Max of the Hot Seat!!

Video 6~ Our family in a life sized kaleidoscope (was so beautiful)

Summer Staycation Part 1

2009-10-14T10:56:00.000-07:00

Summer break flew by so quick this year. It seemed like it was nearly over the moment it started! For the first half of summer break we were super busy in taking care of things regarding Jacques' adoption. It was so worthwhile and we thank God that it worked out so great! However, it also was not a very fun time for the kids as we spent long days running from one medical appointment to another and other not-so-fun-for-kids errands. We were so proud of them though for how good they were for us. They had great attitudes about it and were willing to do whatever it takes to bring home their brother!

The second half of summer we decided to try and make it really special for the kids. We allowed each of the four boys to choose anywhere within driving distance to go for a vacation day. They each were assigned a week and they got to choose that weeks outing. The weeks went from youngest to oldest so Luke got to choose the first place and he chose SANTA CRUZ BEACH BOARDWALK!!!! Which just happens to be a place I love going to! (Oh no... I didn't encourage him to choose it at all) wink wink

We also had some visitors staying with us so it was a real party at the boardwalk! We started out on the beach. It was a gorgeous day for the beach and the views were breathtaking!

Then we hit the rides on the boardwalk~

Jude and Lovenie had their first ever rides on a Ferris wheel!

Jude and Kyle on top of the world! Or, at least on top of the boardwalk

Jim and Luke enjoy the view from the top

Lovenie (on the right) is so brave and will ride almost anything without fear!!

End result was some happy happy kids (and a happy Mom and Dad too!)

Home Schooling On The Run

2009-10-09T14:12:00.000-07:00

Today we had an appointment to have our new car receive it's 3 months service (can't believe it has been 3 mo. already!). Problem is that the appointment was at 8AM which just happens to be the same time Jude needs to be at school. So a little shuffling happened and Jim took the van and went into work a little later then usual so that he could drop Jude off at school. My quest was to have the other 4 kids dressed, fed, and school work packed to head out the door by 7:30 AM. This is HUGE for me since I am not used to having to leave the house until around 10AM at the earliest with the kids, and even that is a challenge.

So we make it to the dealership at EXACTLY 8AM (I was quite proud of us!). We handed over the car and hit the lobby to begin our school day. Kyle and Johnny set up shop with their laptops at a table. Luke sat in a big comfy chair with his 2nd grade work on his lap. Lovenie and I snuggled in another chair and worked on learning how to draw and say "square". We decided to take a break and hit the free hot cocoa machine. It was really just a lovely time! Afterwards we stopped in at a McD's with a coffee shop type lounge area where, once again, laptops, workbooks, and notepads made their appearance. After a while the kids took their "recess" on the play scape. I sat outside watching them play, soaking up sun, and sipping sweet tea while listening to our children play. Many times they would return to me to dish out hugs and "I love you Mom" 's. What sweet sweet children. They are such a joy to me!!

On Thursday mornings Kyle has started a drama/choir club. While he is in practice the rest of us set up school at a picnic table in the sunshine and midway take a picnic snack break. So lovely!! At least 4 out of 5 days a week we find ourselves spending at least some time outdoors for school. I've just been overwhelmed lately at what a joy, honor, and blessing it is that I am able to home school our children. I'm often asked by people "how do you do it" or hear "I would never have the patience to home school my kids". It's just not that way for me. I find myself being far more stressed trying to get Jude off to his public school by their set time, pick him up again at their set time, and then spend the same amount of time helping with his home work that it would take me to just home school him! I can't wait for the day that we think he is ready to be home schooled too!! I love the freedom we have in home schooling. I love the things that our children are not being exposed to before an age appropriate time.

This morning I was reading an article called "Parenting With No Regrets" and it was about a family that had decided to home school their children. Just seven weeks later they were in a terrible car accident and only the Father survived. His wife and 4 children were killed. He talks about how very thankful he was for so much family time in those last days. After reading that I was just soaking up the moments that I got to hug the kids, laugh with them, reward their good work in hugs and kisses, and think about what a huge blessing it is to have each of those moments with them. This is a time in our children's lives that we will not be able to get back and I am SO thankful to have so many precious moments with them!!

Crazy Hats & Rodent Treats

2009-10-02T08:50:00.001-07:00

This week has given me some fun opportunities to be a little creative. Recently our kids started Awanas for the first time. We take them and drop them all off and Jim and I find ourselves alone for 1.5 hours every Wed. evening. We LOVE it!!! We've been making it our date night and having dinner alone at nearby restaurants. This Wed. was Crazy Hat night. Being short on crazy hats around the house I grabbed my balloons and pump and started trying some new things with these results~ Strange little happy people sitting on our children's heads

UCO~ Unidentified Creature Objects

I made many extras to leave for children that came without hats. They were a huge hit. It was so fun when we picked our kids up and I saw so many kids and volunteers running around in my silly little hats!

Earlier in the week I made the kids these peanut butter and chocolate Rodents. Who doesn't love a little rodent for your afternoon snacking pleasure? (I thought of you Mom)

Fun week. Good Times~ Can't believe it is Friday already!!!

Much Needed Approval

2009-09-29T23:00:00.000-07:00

We were not watching for it. I was not checking day after day, hanging around the mailbox. None of the things that usually happen when we are expecting exciting news. I simply went to the mailbox hours after the mail arrived today. I was enjoying a light conversation with Jim while sorting through the mail when my eyes caught the envelope that sent my heart pounding.

I've shared on here much about the many challenges we faced in getting our I-600 (immigration paperwork) filed before the deadline. I've also shared the seriousness of our one and only shot for everything to go right or Jacques would not be able to come to America. We could not file again due to his age. Well, tonight we received word from USCIS (immigration). We were so shocked to see the envelope because we were not expecting to hear anything for months from now while it was being processed. So when I saw it my heart sank knowing that it was a denial. That is the only explanation for receiving it so quickly. It takes far less time to deny a petition then to approve it. So, again... imagine our total shock when we read that the I-600 had been APPROVED!!!! Done deal Baby!!!!!!! When everything is completed in Haiti Jacques WILL COME TO AMERICA!!!!!

For everything to unfold the way that it all has is nothing short of a miracle. It all seemed so impossible so many times, and yet, an approval has happened! To this we give ALL the credit to God who amazes us time and time again!

We continue to wait for Jacques' passport and visa. As of a few months ago we were being told that he would be home to us in time for Christmas. Now we are being told there are suddenly "complications" with the paper work. We are not being given any reason as to what those complications are but we think we know the answer. We are now being told not to expect him home until June of next year at the soonest. Maybe that will be the case, and then again.... maybe not! It's the kind of thing we just have to hand over to God and trust His will to unfold exactly the way it is meant to. We cannot trust in Him and fear the words of man at the same time. So trust in Him we will, and we look forward to celebrating and sharing with you all as even more exciting miracles unfold!!!

Latch Hook Extensions

2009-09-28T12:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I finished re-doing Lovenie's Latch hook extensions for the second time. I think they are just darling on her! I've promised a few friends to share how to do it so here it goes~

To prepare the hair deep condition it for about 20 minutes to make it soft and detangle easily
Make a part in the hair right down the middle of the head and then five equal parts on each side, front to back of the head. Then cornrow or piggyback braid each of the parts. Use a generous amount of palmade on the hair as you braid it. Once you have 10 braids you are ready to begin with the Latch hook extensions.

Slide a latch hook carefully under the braid.

Cut the extensions in 3rds or half (depending on the length you want). I cut some in 3rds to use around the front of the face to make bangs and layers and then switched to cutting the extensions in half for longer hair. Fold one piece of extension in half and place the middle of it inside the hook. Close the latch hook and pull in back through the center of the braid.

Pull through enough to make a loop on the other side of the braid. Remove the latch hook. Grab the two loose ends and pull them inside of the loop you created. Gently pull it all the way through the loop and it will create a tie to the braid. I usually do another loose tie (like the beginning of a shoelace tie) to further secure the extension. Do not worry about that making it more difficult to take out later. It is incredibly simple and quick to remove.

Now repeat a few hundred times, covering each braid as you work your way down to the back of the head. You can space them to make it as full as you like. Expect the process to take around 4-6 hours. It is rewarding work as it looks great and is very low maintenance for the next 4-6 weeks.

End Result with cutting the extensions in half.

End Results with the extensions cut in 3rds

So Much Going On

2009-09-20T16:58:00.000-07:00

It's been 15 days since my last post. I can hardly believe it! There is so much that I am excited to share but have been having some computer issues. Hopefully I'll be up and running again soon with photos and family adventures galore!

Happy 17TH Sweet Son!!!

2009-09-05T16:27:00.000-07:00

Today we celebrate the birthday of our newest family member... Jacques Obain Laughlin! How I wish we could spend it with him. It occured to me recently that the very first time we'll get to spend his birthday with him he will be turning 18, a legal adult! We've managed to miss every single birthday of his childhood but will be here to celebrate all of his adult birthdays. The day he promises forever to his bride... we'll be there. When he has his first child... we'll be there. For every holiday, heartache, and celebration.... we'll be there. Because a "child" does not need parents just when they are little but parents are needed all through out our lives. It's an honor to be Jacques' family! We thank God again today for creating him and allowing us to belong with him!

Our plan was to go celebrate his birthday at a waterpark but it ended up being a cold day AND Jim needed to be at work all night tonight. So, me and the kids are headed out in a bit to have a mellow celebration and then will hit the waterpark next weekend.

We are asking, as a gift for Jacques' birthday, that our family and friends please remember him in prayer today.

Another Lesson I Learned From My Kids

2009-08-24T20:19:00.000-07:00

I am constantly being taught lessons about kindness and love from my kids. Today's teachers were the above brothers. Jude (11) and Johnny (8). We had been out running errands for hours and the kids had been little angels. I decided to treat them each to their very own scoop of ice cream. They roared with excitement! Ice Cream treats are serious business with our kids. Half of us got our ice cream in a cup and the other half got theirs on a cone. Johnny had not even had a chance to enjoy his cold delight when it rolled off the cone and on the floor. His little face just fell. Jude (who had his in a cup) immediatly asked Johnny for his cone. I could see the wheels turning in Johnny's head as he processed that by giving Jude his cone he would have nothing. He handed his cone over to his brother. Jude began to scoop at least half of his ice cream onto Johnny's cone and handed it back to him. Johnny's look of shock was priceless. Sheer awe and joy!! It brought tears to my eyes to see my boys acting so beautifully towards each other.

What if we all behaved this way? What if we gave even thinking we would get nothing in return? What if we shared generously and unexpectedly with others who have nothing? Wouldn't we all live happier lives?

A VERY Exciting Announcement

2009-08-14T20:23:00.000-07:00

News just in~ An adoption decree HAS been issued making Jacques our legal son!!! We've waited over 2.5 years to see this happen. It's surreal to know that it's really happening. Nothing can ever change him being our son for the rest of eternity!!! Such JOY!!!!

We are still on a major deadline for his immigration paper work. We are receiving the papers we need from dear friends that have picked them up in Haiti and are hand delivering them to us tomorrow. Now we just need to keep praying that his passport and visa will be approved so our dear son can come home!

Thanks for your prayers and for sharing in all the ups and downs that has brought us to this great moment of celebration!!!!

A Welcomed Break From Stress

2009-08-13T13:32:00.000-07:00

Sometimes the sadness and muck of life can becoming overwhelming but I am so very thankful that God knows when we need a lift and He sends one our way. Not only does he send it but He sends it PERFECTLY! The lift He sent us this time was my very dear Mom. She drove to our home to stay with us for a few days and told me "Think of me as your live in Nanny while I'm here". How could I not LOVE that! Within hours of her arrival I found myself running errands without children. I love my kids but sometimes need a break. I ran those errands with a giant grin on my face and spring in my step. It was then that it hit me that I used to nearly always be this cheerful and seem to have lost a lot of it with the demands and stress of life (especially since the adoptions). It was so great to feel "myself" again for a while. Not only was she wonderful to me but she is SO FUN with her grandkids! She spoils and spoils them. It's out of control really, but I try to look the other way because... really, shouldn't grandparents be all about the out of control spoiling? I LOVE how much she enjoys them and they enjoy her. She just brought so much FUN to us all and we really needed it! The above photo is of the kids with their gift from Nana. The worlds longest gummy snake candy!

THEN, she told Jim and I to head out and enjoy a date night together. I was SO excited as we had not been out on a date in 7 months! We got to ride in our new car together for the first time and headed to San Francisco to Ghiradelli Square. We had a late night snack in a nice restaurant overlooking the ocean. Then we headed to the Ghiradelli shop and restaurant while we had a ridiculous amount of yummy chocolate and ice cream!

Afterwards we decided to take a stroll on the beach. It was very late on a Monday night and there was almost no one around. We had to cut through a little park to get to the beach. Once there we realized we were being followed by someone sipping out of a brown paper bag and acting shady. He kept watching us and slowly moving more and more towards us. I pointed out an area where we could somewhat see and hear other people hanging out so suggested that maybe it would be a good idea to move that way. Once closer we found it was a large group of people totally drunk and acting crazy. Okay, maybe not my best idea! Meanwhile the guy that was originally following us was moving in closer to us. So we decided to quickly cut back through the park. As we hurried along the trail we caught some movement ahead of us. It was a SKUNK hanging out on the trail. We laughed outloud when we realized that we were now having to make a decision between passing the skunk or going back to the drunks. Hmmmm.... Everyone has to make that decision on a date, right? Totally normal. So we picked the drunks and made our way past them without incident.

The following morning was my "date" time alone with my Mom. My Mom is one of my favorite people on this planet. She's just a BLAST to hang out with. We left early in the morning and rode the Bart (train) to Union Square in San Francisco. It was my Mom's first ride on a commuter train. I kept trying to mess with her and telling her to get on or off at the wrong places. She endured me with great humor. While everyone else sat quietly she and I talked and laughed totally having a BLAST!

Once in SF we found a yummy bakery where we had our breakfast together in this Galleria. The rest of the day was spent "shopping" at Saks 5th Ave, Tiffany's, Barney's, and more. It was so fun to see the many designer things. The clothes, shoes, jewelry... it was all more works of art then just merchandise. The price tags were the kinds that make your eyes bulge out of your head so that was fun to check out too. At Saks we spent time checking out designer shoes like Prada, Jimmy Choo, and Manolo Blahniks. I couldn't resist seeing what it would be like to walk around in a pair of Manolo's so put some on and OUCH. If I were to spend thousands of dollars on one pair of shoes I would expect to feel like I'm walking on clouds, not being tortured!

The next couple days continued on with my Mom jumping in and helping with the home and kids. When she wasn't doing that she was entertaining us. We were so sad to see her go but enjoyed so much what a gift she was to us while here.

Us Mothers Should Be Able to Understand, yes?

2009-08-07T20:28:00.000-07:00

Johnny gave himself an assignment to write a report on mosquitos. I thought you might enjoy some of the fascinating details that are presented in a "Oh So Johnny" style~

Do all mosquitoes bite? No. In fact, only the females bite. The females suck your blood for her babies. I know you don't like it but it's all part of being a good mother. When it sucks a lot of blood it starts to look like a red balloon. This happens when it sucks blood of half it's weight. There are a more then 3,000 kinds of mosquitoes. Mosquitoes are among the deadliest of all creatures. It's real size is like the size of a flea. It's this tall l and this wide --- . A female mosquito's wings can beat an amazing 500 times a second. That's half the speed of time!!! By Johnny. (according to Johnny~ time is 1 second. 1 second is 1000 milliseconds. So, 500 times a second is half the speed of time. Lost? Don't worry~ so are we... because it doesn't make sense, but it sure is funny!)

Bet you didn't know that eh? Now the next time you get a bite you will know it's just a fellow mother trying to care for her young. Be kind~ skip the repellent. Then again... it is one of the deadliest of all creatures.......

Mystery Solved~ A diagnosis for Lovenie

2009-08-07T08:33:00.000-07:00

Many of you know the story that lead us to our children in Haiti. It all started when Lovenie had a "stroke" that left her in very bad shape. What has been unknown was if it was a stroke for sure or something else, or what caused that to happen in a baby. We have wondered these things for over four years now. Now that Lovenie has been home with us for a while we have had a chance to take her to many different doctors and specialists. Many tests were done and we now know that Lovenie did not have a stroke or any other neurological problem. To have done as much damage to her as it did there would be signs that show up on the MRI. They also ruled out illnesses that may have brought on her disabilities. They ruled out everything they could think of before sharing their diagnosis. They are very confident that they know what happened to disable our little girl.

Lovenie is a victim of shaken baby syndrome. Her disabilities and injuries are exact to the damage caused by shaking an infant. After all these years of believing that what happened to her couldn't have been helped, it was a real blow to learn that someone DID this to our precious little girl. A few seconds more would likely have killed her. They evaluated her to be about 60% brain damaged and while you never know... they suspect that she has peaked and that she will continue on in her life at this level. Furthermore, Lovenie has some problems with her eyes that will require surgery. We were told the only way for her to have the kind of damage she has is to have received a hard blow (or blows) to that side of her head. We are unsure if this happened during the shaking episode, and her head was hit while shaking her (which is common to happen) or if it was done at another time. However, we suspect that this part was likely done to her at an early age by her birth mom. Stephanie and Jude have told us many stories of their Mom beating them repeatedly in the head when she is angry, using rocks or hard metal objects. So it is not a real stretch to suspect the same was done to Lovenie. What's really concerning is their two little brothers still in the home with this abusive mother. PLEASE pray with us for their safety! Abuse is a sad and ugly thing. :-(

So we've been adjusting since that appointment to the idea of what really happened to disable our daughter. Strangely it seems so much more a tragedy that this was done to her rather then a natural health issue. She's such a delightful and precious little girl that we can hardly bare the knowledge of how hurt she has been. She is doing amazingly well at home with us. She is so loved on and just thriving. We'll do all we can to see to it that the rest of her life is safe and happy from here on out!

I would also like to ask for prayers for Jim and I as we need to make some really tough decisions based on other concerning information that has come to our attention. We are unsure about how to proceed but want to make sure we do it with wisdom and truth and do it in the right way. Also prayers for our family as something really bad happened to one of our children again a couple days ago that has us really upset. For privacy reasons I will not post what happened but please pray for the healing of our family as we continue to go through more heartaches. Adoption is a worthwhile and wonderful thing but it does not come without it's risks and trials. Thanks for your friendships, your prayers, and your support!

Ticking towards the deadline...

2009-07-30T11:44:00.000-07:00

I had posted an update recently regarding things going on with our adoption of Jacques and decided it is time to update the update. Our home study is nearly complete and we were looking forward to being done with it last Saturday. However, I managed to come down with a flu right before and have been in bed for days. Obviously, we had to reschedule. So it is currently the plan to have our home study interview this coming Saturday. I am still sick but seem to be getting better. Just praying I am well enough by Saturday as we are out of time for rescheduling. We still have not received the paper work needed from Haiti. We were told we should have that by the end of this month. That would mean by tomorrow~ not holding my breath on this one! It HAS to come soon. There is no other option, as further delay could very well mean not bringing Jacques to America! He will be our legal son with no way to bring him home. It's crazy really!

Saturday is also the one year anniversary of our children coming home! In some ways I can't believe it's true, and in other ways it's hard to believe so much could have happened in just one year. I'm sure I'll post more soon about our first year together. I think it is fair to say that we have experienced some post adoption challenges that go way beyond the regular post adoption challenges. A lot of joy but also a lot of pain and tears. It's been a very full year.

Unfortunately, some parts are not getting better just yet. We received another blow of just awful information last week that I'm still reeling from. I keep making the mistake of thinking "How could we possibly receive any worse information then what we've already learned"... and then it happened! It's not something I feel able or ready to share just yet. However, it has caused Jim and I many hours of discussions about our moral responsibility of what to do with this new awful information. Please pray for wisdom for us as we decide!

Just Wanna Go Home

2009-07-24T23:33:00.001-07:00

It is not often that we get photo's of our handsome Jacques Obain so I was thrilled to get these pictures from my friend Amy when she returned from Haiti.

Just a few days prior I had received a photo in the mail (which now resides in my purse) along with a letter from Jacques. It was brought to the US by my friend Bryn when she returned from her trip to Haiti.

Getting a very rare communication from Jacques is a treasure indeed! However, it also was a bit hard to read as he shared his desire to be home with us. In part of his letter he wrote: I finished school and will be in the twelveth grade. But I don't want to go to school in Haiti again. I just wanna go home.

And we just want him home too!

"Let's Be Logical In Our Insanity"

2009-07-23T06:58:00.000-07:00

This post title is an actual quote from my dear husband last night. It was really funny because it's SO us. We tend to do things that makes me wonder~ are we GENIUS OR TOTALLY INSANE? On our most recent shenanigan the jury is still out.

Once a decade I throw my husband a big bash. His 30th birthday I really went all out and we had a very memorable Luau party complete with a real roasted pig turning on a spit in the backyard, a dunk tank, a HUGE beach backdrop and props for souvenir photos (that were taken by a Polaroid camera and placed in a keepsake photo frame), cool decorations everywhere, and catered with Hawaiian food.

So this year I am attempting to top last decades party as Jim is turning 40. No over the hill party for this youthful guy! Those who know us well know that we are glued to our TV on Wednesday nights to watch Lost. So we will be hosting a Lost themed party this time. Lost takes place on an island so we need us a beach.

So far not too much sounds real insane about the party plans but here comes the crazy part~ We managed to get in touch with a paving company that had ordered $15,000 worth of really cool, colorful, high quality sand for a project they were going to do for the Crowne Plaza Hotel. For whatever reason they ended up not using it so wanted to get rid of it. They allowed us to take it all for FREE if we just pick it up and take it away!!!!! We had wanted to find "some" sand for both decoration and a couple of party events we had in mind. However, we never thought we could get our hands on enough to turn areas of our own back yard into a private beach!

Last night Jim pulled into our driveway with a 16' Ryder truck full of what we figured was around 5 TONS of sand that Jim and I now needed to unload. This is the point that we stood gazing at it all and wandered if we were just totally nuts to be doing this.

All of these green tubs are Large outdoor garbage cans. We figured each can to weigh as much as up to 500 lbs each.

It really is beautiful sand. It even FEELS good to the touch as it is specially made sand. It is hard to see well in this picture but this tub had this pretty blue, brown, and tan sand. We also have a lot of black and white sand, and another mix of very pretty light red, orange, and gold sand. We are going to have a seriously exotic beach! This sand is not as dusty as regular beach sand and does not stick on you as much as regular sand.

The kids were so excited to crawl around in the truck checking it all out.

Kyle, Johnny, Luke, and Lovenie laugh hard as they all tried as hard as they could to move a can and couldn't get it to even budge. UPDATE~ Johnny informs me that they DID move it 3 inches. (where that estimate comes from only he knows)

How do two people move 5 tons of sand by themselves? Well, the plan was to use a hand cart until we discovered that we had a flat tire on it and it was no help at all. We were at least very thankful to have a lift gate on the truck! When we attempted to move the tubs this is when my engineer (I'm convinced the mind of an engineer just works differently then the rest of us) analyzed the situation and came up with the most clever and efficient way to get the job done. I told him how impressed I was with him and this is when I got the response of "Yes, let's be logical in our insanity!". Okay, well, at least there was some logic used at some point!

Oceanside Exercise

2009-07-21T21:05:00.001-07:00

These days EVERY day is a full and busy day. I can't believe how busy we have been. These last couple of weeks have been a not-real-fun-busy of long days with back to back medical appointments, paper work, and errands.

Today started off with a bang as all 7 of us had dental appointments. I was worried about how all the kids would do but they were total ANGELS. They make their Mama so proud! However, the good behavior ended with the kids as the staff and dentist were so rude and yuck. We will not be returning. Does anyone that lives near us have a dentist that they love and would want to share with us?

Then we had to run a really yuck appointment~ to CPS, groan. I can't tell you how much it bothers me to have a file with CPS. I guess we assumed that if you are a good parent you will not have to deal with them, but with adoption (especially of older children) there are risks. Anyways... I need a copy of the report from when they had to come to our home due to the situation with Stephanie. I've been calling and trying to get it for 3 weeks but I keep reaching voicemail and leaving messages but no one would return my call. We need it to wrap up our home study. So today I decided to jump in the car and drive to Oakland and show up at the office and not leave until I had it in my hands. Once I got there I learned that you can not approach the office as you are stopped in the lobby by police officers behind a window. When I told them why I was there they told me that I could not get a report by coming to the office and would need to CALL to request the report and then wait 2-3 weeks to receive it. Not being intimidated by the badge I pressed on and (politely) insisted that I had tried that route and it wasn't working and I needed that report ASAP. They finally called the office and managed to get me on the phone with someone (which I had decided already made the trip worth while!). She too started to tell me that she would take the request but then I must wait the 2-3 weeks for the report. I don't know if it was sweet talking or the near hysteria in my voice that won her over but she decided to make an exception for me and do the report. 45 minutes after arriving I walked out with it! Woo Hoo!!! Here is hoping that this will be my last interaction with CPS~ EVER!

I was aware that the many errands like this are just no fun for the kids, and they have been so very good for me through them all. So, I decided it was time to forget all that needed to be done and go and have some fun with them. So off we went to a Marina and park that someone told me about. It was so great to breathe in some ocean air while we did the par course together. We had taken Maisy (our sweet dog) with us and you could tell she was just as happy as all the kids were. Then we ended off the outing with dinner at a nearby Marina restaurant that we've eaten at once before and loved. Jim was working late (to make up the time he took off to help at the dentist) so it was just me and the kids. They are fabulous dinner dates!

Seven Groans

2009-07-21T07:34:00.000-07:00

because we have seven dental appointments this morning. Our life of adventures is sometimes fun and sometimes.... well.....

Johnny's New Look

2009-07-17T08:53:00.000-07:00

NOTICE ANYTHING NEW?

The Race To Our Goal Continues!

2009-07-14T21:48:00.000-07:00

Update on how the Home Study is coming together~ Oh man... it has been non-stop (or so it seems) working on doing all we need to do for the home study. First it was the stacks of paper work. I had piles of papers all over our big desk and even in stacks on the floor all around it. It was crazy! There are just so many papers and so many details to take care of.

For the last week and a half we have really been swamped with the medical exams that need to be done for every family member in our home. Yes, that would be 7 physicals we need done in a matter of a couple weeks! Beyond that, Jim and I need all sorts of lab work done. So, that would be enough alone but in the physicals for the kids so many other things are coming up. Especially with Johnny and Lovenie. They are being referred out to so many specialists for so many different things that I have lost count of it all. Last week we took Lovenie to the eye doctor to learn that she will be sent on to a specialist and will be needing eye surgeries. She is also being sent on to a neurologist, development specialist (for her delays from the stroke), speech therapy, and so much more. This week was Johnny's turn. Some of his highlights are that his poor little hips are such a mess that he may need to use braces, his vision is so bad that we ordered glasses for him today, his doctor thinks he may have tourettes (something we have been told by another doctor in the past too), and ADHD, in addition to his aspergers (high functioning autism)! Many many specialists, X-rays, prescriptions, injections, etc. There are also the more minor things like his sinus infection and bad allergies. Also last week we did an X-ray on Jude's wrists to get an idea of how old he really is. I feel like I'm juggling one appointment or testing after another and it doesn't look like it will be slowing down anytime soon but I'm so very thankful that our kids are getting the help they need! Between today, and a couple days last week, I am clocking in 31 hours of non-stop running errands and appointments, in 3 days, with 5 kids. Need I express how very tired I am?

All that being said~ The home study is coming along wonderfully! The agency we are working with has been so good to us. Our new home study has basically already been written and is just waiting for the last of our medical exams (Kyle gets his done next week and we'll be done with those!), a couple referral letters, and a visit from their social worker (which happens on Saturday the 25th). Looks like everything is falling into place. The pace set to make this all happen in such a short time has been tough but it's working! We've also been told that we will receive from Haiti all the paper work that is being requested by USCIS (immigration) by the end of this month. This all makes our immigration deadline of August 21st very likely doable!

That miracle we were praying for seems to be unfolding. Thanks for all your prayers!

Last First On The Fourth

2009-07-05T21:45:00.001-07:00

So the kids have been home 11 months now and we realized on the 4th of July that it was the last first Holiday we would experience with them! Pretty cool. We decided to take a gamble and stay home, hoping that we would be able to see a firework show from our home (being new to the area we had no idea if we would be able to see some or not). We scored big. Not only did we see a firework show, but from our view point we saw FOUR going at the same time. Way Cool!!

We also made a fire and enjoyed some gooey smores while we waited.

We found that the best place to catch the show was from our bedroom balcony. It was great to be huddled up together to keep us all warm. After the fireworks we busted out sparklers. It was a first for all our kids. The highlight was setting off tons of party poppers in the house that left confetti all over. The kids thought that was a blast!

Today, Sunday, we went to a bbq. The kids had a blast swimming. This great photo caught Jude mid-flip.

A Very Happy 6th Birthday!

2009-06-30T14:33:00.000-07:00

A very big Happy 6th birthday to our darling Luke! He managed to get 3 different days of celebration this year~

This evening was our family birthday celebration. At Luke's request we dined at Pizza Hut. Then we returned home for SpongeBob cake and presents.

Earlier in the day we had a very special treat. Friends of ours came to see us during their move back to the US from Spain. The Brownwell family is one of the sweetest, funnest, and most adventurous families that we know. They have 3 daughters adopted from Haiti and the oldest, Kerline, was at NLL/HFC with our children. I had the honor of traveling with Kerline and her Mom as she was being brought home to America. What an honor that was! It was a sweet reunion.

Kerline and Lovenie~ Lovenie would not leave her side.

The Brownwell and Laughlin kids together. Just as soon as they left we all were saying we wished they would come right back and hang out with us some more!

Over the weekend we took the family for Luke's birthday activity request~ Glow in the dark miniature golf at Super Franks!~

Even before these celebrations, Luke had a little celebration at his Nana and Papa's house as well. One of the highlights was that 6 is the jackpot age that he is no longer, by law, needing to use a booster seat. He sat for the first time with only a belt buckle and grinned all the way to the pizza parlor. I'm pretty sure he thinks he's all grown up now. His presents were WII games he really wanted so the boys have been given permission to stay up all night playing together (as long as they are quiet enough to not wake up Mom and Dad)!

Adoption Adventure Continues On

2009-06-26T12:55:00.001-07:00

Adoption is a roller coaster ride. In the last week or so we have certainly been reminded of that again. We are plugging along with the adoption of Jacques. His adoption is especially tough because he is 16. 16 is the magic age that kids are suddenly no longer adoptable (by law) so we had to be at certain stages of the adoption before his 16th birthday. Because of his age we have had to file his immigration forms before his last birthday and if they are denied we will not be able to refile. We've got one shot with no room for anything to go wrong. So what happens?... Things start looking like they could go very wrong very fast!

When we turned in Jacques' immigration forms we were told we would only need to submit a couple more things of paper work, including a home study update, and an adoption decree (which we can not get until the adoption is complete in Haiti). We were told that we were automatically given one year to turn in the remaining paper work, but if we needed more time it would be no problem to extend that.

Fast Forward several months~ We moved from Southern CA to the Bay Area so we had to transfer our file from USCIS (immigration) office in LA to San Francisco. The transfer went just fine. Once we were moved into our new place, and got everything settled for Stephanie, we were now finally able to move forward with getting our home study update done. I spent some time researching the many adoption agencies in our new area and eventually chose one to begin the process with. We needed a simple home study updating the changes to our last home study update. At least... that's what we needed according to the USCIS website and the letter we got from the LA USCIS office. A quick home study update still usually takes about 2 months to complete and we had only 2 months until we needed to have our paper work turned in. Knowing that it was going to be a very close call I contacted USCIS and asked them how to go about getting the extension for more time (as we were told by the LA office). The SF office responded and told us that they would not give us an extension. We were very disappointed but also motivated to hurry up and complete this update. USCIS also sent me a long list of additional information that they wanted (some of it were things that we do not receive with a Haitian adoption, and most of it is not what the instructions say to include). Ah, the stress! If only that was all that happened~
So I got my hands on the home study paper work and started in on it at record breaking speeds! During the week we received another blow when the agency called and said they contacted USCIS and were told that they would not accept a home study update from us but were requiring us to do an entirely new home study! A new home study done quickly usually takes 2-3 months at least. We didn't have that long! What can we do? We had to give it a shot. So I got back to the paper work and making contacts to gather everything asked from us. I was just wrapping up the majority of the paper work and feeling really encouraged when we got another phone call from the agency. They told us that they suddenly realized that, due to a new law that affects their license, they might not be able to complete our home study at all. Are you kidding me? So all the work was a waste and we were back to square one. In my last conversation with them they told me that our home study was so complicated that they didn't think they would be able to have done it in time for us anyways. Nice! So now all the work we had done was unusable, very valuable time had been lost, and we needed to start all over again. We also learned that the decision of USCIS that we needed a whole new home study was due to the agency misrepresenting the home study we did have. :(

With a sense of dread I started calling around agencies to see if any of them thought they could complete a whole new home study in just 7 weeks or less. At last I spoke with someone totally unfazed by our deadline. They are working with us in an attempt to complete it in just 3-4 weeks!!! And, by the way, they are willing to do it for us for less then a third of the cost then the last place. My jaw dropped and I was so relieved. So here we are again, working non-stop on our new home study but this time without feeling as stressed about it. We still do need to receive all of the paper work, including adoption decree, from Haiti before the deadline. If everything does not fall into place on time then we will have a legally adopted son in another country with no way to bring him home.

A twist on the fairy tales~

2009-06-18T20:14:00.000-07:00

The boys try to reach us as me and Lovenie await our rescue from our balcony.

The funniest part is the look on Johnny's face and when he cries out "Be careful guys, we're going to tip up here!" BOOM!!!!!

My First Shoeshine

2009-06-18T11:27:00.000-07:00

The day I left Port-de-Paix, Haiti, was an emotional journey. I spent the last hour or so in a room alone with Stephanie. We talked, prayed together, and sobbed through our goodbyes. I was still ill and, combined with the emotional drain, I was totally depleted of any energy.

I climbed into an SUV for our trip to the Port-de-Paix airport, along with 3 pastors. I was certainly in good hands! ;) As Keith and I were dropped off at the airport, the very kind Pastor Andy looked me straight in the eyes and told me that Stephanie was going to be just fine. I was so thankful for his kindness but had to jump out quickly before bursting into tears. You know the law of tears... once you let 'em loose it's hard to keep them from continuing! We got checked in at the tiny little airport and then were sent behind the building to the "waiting area". Never before had I seen such a beautiful waiting area. It was outdoors and looked like a little spot of paradise! While we were outside waiting a young boy approached me (I'm guessing he was about 11 years old) and asked me if I would like my shoes shined. I politely told him no thank you. I was so wrapped up in my own exhaustion and sadness that it did not occur to me that this little boy is probably in great need of the money for food and is only seeking work. As he walked away it hit me and I wondered why on earth I would have told him no. Then I looked down at my shoes and thought "YIKES!" they were caked with mud from walking the wet dirt roads.

After quickly asking Keith how much I tip for a shoe shine I went after the boy. He sat down and spread out his supplies. He took off the first shoe and I had no idea where to put my bare foot until he put down a rag and motioned for me to put it there. Honestly the ground probably would have been a cleaner spot to put my foot down, but the little boy's act of kindness was heart warming. The shoeshine boy was quiet and shy so did not speak much to me. While watching him work another boy came over to chat with me in English and Creole. He was so cute~ wanting to know what it is like in America. I enjoyed chatting with him and hearing about his life in Haiti. The shoeshine boy continued to work on with my shoes. When he was done I was blown away. They looked better then new! They were spotless and shiny black! I tipped him generously and told him what a wonderful job he did. He was all shy grins. I have been home now for a month and my shoes still look better then new. Every time I look at them I think of the sweet shy boy making it on his own and say a prayer for him. He has likely forgotten about me but he will remain in my memories forever. There was just something so special about that little bit of time with him.

Lovenie's 5th Birthday Celebration

2009-06-12T13:51:00.001-07:00

I think it's safe to say that Lovenie had a FANTASTIC 1st birthday in America and with her family! It started with lots of primping to make her Princess Lovenie in the morning. She was then on her way to her last day of preschool. I had heard they were having an ice cream party for the last day of school so we picked up these cupcakes and I left them with her teachers.

They were kind enough to take some photos for me of her celebration with her classmates.

Already on a sugar high, we also had this cake for the family party.

I keep marveling at how big our baby girl is getting... at least I was until I saw this picture of her with Chuck E Cheese. She looks so tiny!

I think the following photos prove that by the end of the day the tiara and attention started to go to her head~

Lovenie

2009-06-12T13:51:00.000-07:00

Princess Lovenie turns 5

2009-06-11T09:39:00.000-07:00

What happened to the little tiny girl we brought home just 10 months ago? She's all grown up and five years old now. What a very special and wonderful day when we at last get to hug, kiss, and spoil rotten our little Lovenie on her birthday!

We have some fun things planned for her today. These photos are from this morning before school. How fun is it to have your birthday on the last day of school?! Score, a double celebration today!!!

Mama said there would be days like this

2009-06-10T14:57:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I laughed when I found Lovenie crashed out at the top of the stairs. It's so exhausting being 4 years old!

Tomorrow will be Lovenie's 5th birthday. It's so hard to believe! It's so wonderful to finally get to be together on her birthday.

Family, Funeral, Friends, and Shopping

2009-06-08T13:15:00.000-07:00

What a weekend! Seems more like we managed to cram a weeks worth of things into a couple of days. Last week Jim's Grandmother in Wisconsin passed away. We managed to get him a ticket for a flight there to be with his family. So happy he was able to go! I wish me and the kids could have gone too but last minute flights for 7 people.... yikes.

While he was away we decided to go on an adventure of our own. So we did our own packing and as soon as Jude was out of school on Friday we began our little road trip to my parent's house. This road trip was extra fun and special because we managed to talk my dear friend Juliette into coming with us. Oh the fun we had with her! We laughed, had serious talks, ate candy, and danced danced danced in the car. We may have been having a little too much fun because Jude asked us to quiet down a bit.

Time at my parents house is always a treat! Our kids prefer to see them even over going to Disneyland (now THAT is saying something). My parents even watched/spoiled all the kids by taking them out to ice cream and giving me and Juliette some shopping time! The town my parents live in has a cute little downtown area that is home to one of my all time favorite shops. It just does not get any girlier then this place. It's called La De Da and is jewelry, purses, shoes, etc. The good news bad news was that they are going out of business so everything was at clearance prices. Whew, did we ever score! Then we hit the second awesome girlie store, What To Wear, and picked out a couple of very unique pieces of clothing. Fun FUN stuff.

The adventure back home was just as much fun with more singing, dancing, and candy eating. We even had arranged for a lunch date with another dear friend that we had not seen in around 7 years. That was awesome!

It was great too to return home to Jim who beat us home and BBQ'd for us all. Now it's Monday and we are back to the grind. I really need to get motivated to work on arranging a home study update done for Jacques' adoption. I'm not a big fan of dealing with the adoption agencies but it needs to happen.

The World's Last Hope

2009-06-02T15:56:00.000-07:00

My favorite quote from today was when Kyle said "I'm going to clean like the whole world is dirty and I am it's last hope!" and then he jumped in and worked his tail off. I could get used to this~

Here are some other random candid photos of our darlings that were taken recently~

Joy riding

Just Chillin'

Check out my new haircut! Maybe less people will think I'm a girl now. Mom loves my hair long and silky.

Park day tree lounging

The most recently photo of Johnny is when he was in the dog kennel (charming). I'd snap a quick shot of him now if it wasn't for the fact that his hair is WILD today. Silly home schooled kids~ fix it if you want to, and if you don't does it really matter?

10 Months Ago

2009-06-01T18:41:00.000-07:00

10 months ago today we brought home our three little Haitian Sensations. In some ways it seems like time has gone by so fast and in others it seems like the LOOOOOONGEST 10 months of my life. ;) Only because of all that has happened though.

Even after 10 months there are electric moments with the kids when I just look at them and am still in awe that they are really home. There are so many little moments like that with little Lovenie. Just to kiss her pumpkin face leaves me giddy with gladness that she is here. And Jude... oh boy, do I love this boy! Some of my favorite moments with him are at bedtime when I'm tucking him in. He lets me kiss his face again and again and give him lots of hugs. At the end of the day he often tells me that I'm the greatest mother ever. Sweet!

Hang in there dear friends that are waiting for their home comings. It really does happen and it won't be long until you are saying "I can't believe they are really home!"

I couldn't imagine our lives without these darling kids!

How Could I NOT Have Fallen?

2009-06-01T14:51:00.001-07:00

Often when I talk to people about trips to Haiti I hear the comment "I would want to bring them all home!" I usually laugh and then explain that I thought I would feel that way too. However, every time I've gone I have never met a child and came back home feeling as if I was supposed to adopt them. I've had a strong connection to the children we were adopting. I've always enjoyed loving on all the other babies, and pray for homes for them too... but just never had a "connection" with any of them. Well, that's all changed now! Meet little, darling, adorable, baby Thomas~

After just rolling onto his tummy for the first time!
Sucking on his big toe. A trick I was very impressed with.

Just being precious.

When I went to say goodbye to him he was sleeping so I just took this farewell photo. It's just as well, it was hard enough saying goodbye!

Now, before anyone gets any funny ideas.... Thomas is possibly spoken for by another family. I'm so thrilled to know he will be going to a loving home! However it did not keep me from falling crazy in love with this little baby. I hope one day to know his new family. I have so many pictures and videos from my time with him I would love to share. I hardly ever had him out of my arms the whole time of my visit. He's just way beyond precious!!!

The day I left we were at the airport getting ready to have our bags searched when Keith whispered to me that it was time to confess if I had stuffed Thomas away in one of my carry on's (something I threatened to do many times). If I could of I would have. ;)

This video is just a glimpse of the many moments we spent together. If you were there you most certainly would have fallen in love with him too~

Favorite Views in Port-au-Paix

2009-05-31T18:20:00.000-07:00

Our time in Port-de-Paix was spent with the family that Stephanie will be living with. If there is one thing that really struck me while I was there was the PEACE and the LOVE in this place! God was most certainly present all around us. We stayed with the Lashbrook Family
What amazing things God is doing through this family and ministry! It was an honor to witness it for a couple of days. They have their family home (where Stephanie is living with them), a boys home, and an adoption home. They also have founded a church, school, and feeding program. The children were so well behaved and you could tell they not only felt very loved but also had big hearts and loved much too!

Here are some of my favorite sights while there;

I loved seeing these donkeys hanging out as I walked back and forth between the different homes.

I wish I would have been here on a Sunday to enjoy service in this church.

The boys home

This brave and sweet mission team group were all camped out in their tents on top of the roof of the church. It made me all the more thankful for the comfy bed I was offered in the Lashbrook's home. ;) Everyone on this team was very sweet but I especially enjoyed meeting my new friend Kim. You know it's a small world when.... I had briefly met Kim and when we got a chance to talk a little bit she informed me that she had been praying for me for months. We just met, How could this be? She has visited my blog! It was such a neat encouragement! She is adopting four children and was there visiting them. HI KIM!!

This is the view from the roof near the boys home. STUNNING! I just stood there saying WOW! Directly on the other side of their building walls was the ocean water. So cool!

If you ever get a chance to visit the Lashbrook Family Ministry in Haiti I strongly encourage it. You will be welcomed and loved like family. The kids will all steal your heart and you will leave a changed person~ encouraged, inspired, and excited!

Traveling To Port de Paix

2009-05-29T06:31:00.000-07:00

After saying goodbye to Jacques (blah). We waited in a small airport in Port au Prince to catch a tiny airplane to take us to Port de Paix. We met up with Stephanie's new family and two interns that were going to be staying and working with them. Much to my delight one of the young interns was the daughter of my friend. I was so excited to meet her!

We had a crummy thing happen while waiting. I did not witness it because I was at the ticket counter but I guess a couple of men started harassing Stephanie and making threats to do things to her. When Dr. Bernard caught wind of this he went and confronted them (wish I could have seen that part!). When I returned from the ticket counter I saw that Dr. Bernard was talking with a security guard but thought nothing of it figuring it was someone he knew. I had no idea of the ruckus that was going on. Once I learned of it I was so glad to get Stephanie on the plane and away from these men.

Once on the flight the tension melted (and we melted a bit in the plane too, HOT). That's when the reality of the adventure hit. The flight was beautiful! The following photos were taken from the plane;

I realize that this photo isn't very visible in blog photo size but the very first thing I noticed when we landed was the donkeys hanging out on the side of the dirt runway. We exited the plane and were greeted by Pastor Andy (GREAT man, more later), and several of Keith and Cindy's older boys from the boys home. They grabbed our carry on's for us and greeted us with hugs. Then my favorite part of the entire trip began.

The ride to their home was a BLAST! My bag with my camera ended up in a different car and I was so bummed. Port de Paix was vastly different from Port au Prince. The streets were all dirt and very muddy due to recent rains. There were some suv's and trucks but the most common transportation was little motorcycles. It was very amusing to watch them determinedly navigating the muddy roads. Progress was slow and slippery. I even watched one motorcycle trying to tow another motorcycle behind him but the rope broke. I was also amused at the many donkeys that seemed to be everywhere. You also had a lot of the same things you see in Port au Prince as far as people walking around balancing large objects on their heads, and the sides of the streets covered with people trying to sell things. The feel of this place was just more adventurous, relaxed, and less dangerous then Port au Prince.

While we made it to their home just fine.... our luggage did not. I was under the assumption that when you take a little plane your luggage goes on it with you. Silly me! Turns out that's not the case. Usually when I fly to Haiti I pack a couple changes of clothes and toiletries in my carry on but didn't think I would need to with this flight. Boy did I regret it! In the heat and dust of Haiti I ended up having to wear the same clothes for 2 full days. Yuck. This isn't much of a big deal in America where we have AC, but in Haiti..... Not pretty.

After a short rest we headed out to meet all the children. It started out with the babies that are cared for in Keith and Cindy's personal home. There were four babies in one of the rooms who were cared for at all times. Precious babies! I'll share more about them soon. Then we moved on to their adoption/girls home. Ending out the tour at the boys home. So much more to share about those places and children, soon!

It was such a sweet thing to hang back and see the children at the adoption home greet Keith upon his homecoming. They call him Dad and you can see how much they love him!

Luke the Good reader (titled by Luke)

2009-05-27T10:39:00.001-07:00

Today our little Lukey read his last story to complete all 5 levels of the Hooked On Phonics Program. He's a super reader now. We are so proud of you Luke!!!

Oh Johnny

2009-05-26T12:26:00.000-07:00

The boys yell out "Mom, look at the trick Johnny can do!"

We all have our laugh. I respond as a mother is expected to with the "Be careful, and Ohhh, that's gross and dirty." And then we all walk away. Seconds later we hear "Uh, Hello. Anyone?" It seems that we all walked away and left him stuck in the dog kennel! Johnny is such a goofball. (insert rolling eyes here)

Days 2 & 3 in PAP

2009-05-24T16:49:00.000-07:00

Thankfully days two and three in Port-au-Prince were considerably less eventful. I continued to be sick so we stayed at the guest house watching movies and playing games on Saturday. I went outside for a while and played some basketball with Jacques. The kid's got some game! Whomped me silly. When we moved on to volleyball he was beating me so badly that I called for reinforcement and Stephanie helped me gang up on~ he still whomped us! Way to go Jaco! Saturday night we got the privilege of seeing two French families come to pick up their adopted children. I was so thrilled for them!

Saturday afternoon is when I also learned that it was the weekend that Dr. Bernard and Claudette were mourning the 3rd anniversary of their daughter's unexpected death. It was so sad. :( We were glad to know to be praying for them through-out the time we were there. I can't even imagine such sadness.

Sunday I was tempted to stay at the guesthouse because I was still ill but instead rallied up my little bit of energy and went to church with the Bernards. I was so glad I did! What an experience church in Haiti always is. If anyone ever doubts there is really a God they need to only go to church in Haiti and FEEL Him all around you! Afterwards Dr. Bernard and Claudette took us to the home of a friend. It was an elderly woman that had a stroke 13 years ago and could not get out of bed to go to church so they brought it to her. It was one of the most beautiful things to witness. We sang with her, prayed over her, talked with her. Sweet sweet woman! Afterwards they showed me the views from her home and they are the background to the following pictures.

Obviously Jacques is taking his sibling role seriously. ;)

Dr. Bernard and Claudette~ they have become family to us. Every time I spend time with them my love and respect for them always grows. They are truly wonderful people!

Getting buggy

I wish I could say the good feelings continued on through-out the day but they did not. Stephanie and I had a big falling out that afternoon when some hurtful things were said. You would think I would have learned by now not to take things personally that are said by someone that is hurting, but it seems I have not really learned it yet. I was hugely offended. I'm sure it didn't help things that the very nature of the trip was sensitive and being tired and ill do not help things either. Poor Jacques could tell that things were not in a happy place between Stephanie and me and he became even more distant from me. I ended up on the phone with Jim that night crying my eyes out. I was venting and saying "WHY am I even here??!!" "Obviously it does not matter and is not appreciated. I am sick and tired and just want to come home. Why should I continue on when the person I am doing it for doesn't even care?" Yes, a crummy little pity party. I had reached the end of my rope and was talking about catching a flight out the next morning and returning home early. I don't like admitting that I can be that wimpy... but I can be. God really convicted me of it. Sick or not, appreciated or not... I was going to keep my commitment and continue on with Stephanie to her new home. It was about the last thing in the world I wanted to do. Now that I can look back at it... God blessed that decision big time!

Last night in Port-au-Prince ended with long talks with Dr. Bernard and Stephanie. It was so hard to watch him getting the news all at once that we had months to adjust to. Stephanie shared information that he planned to take immediate action about that could affect the lives of many others. In the long run I know it will be in a positive way. Afterwards Dr. Bernard had a bit of a counseling session with just Jacques and me. It was then that Jacques got the full story of what has really been going on in our home. I think the distance between us had to do with him thinking that Stephanie had just become too difficult for us so we were sending her away. Can you imagine the affect that would have on a son coming home to us? Once he knew the facts, and heard the truth about why things were happening the way they were... everything changed. All distance between us melted away. He was so kind and loving again afterwards and I was so glad to see that his heart seemed to be at ease again. Of course this also made our goodbyes the next morning so much harder. By the end of the night Stephanie and I had been restored as well. I was so proud of her for being so brave and talking about things that were so painful and difficult to discuss. She has strength that I admire.

Hang in there with me~ the story takes some sweet turns from here on.

Day One In Port-Au-Prince

2009-05-23T16:17:00.000-07:00

If I could sum up Day one in one word it would most likely be~ AWFUL. :( We got into the airport with no problem so that was positive but the rest of the day was beyond tough. We first went to the office to meet with Dr. Bernard and Claudette (orphanage director and wife). We then went into a long and difficult discussion about the details of what has been happening in our home. I could tell it broke their hearts to hear it, but they were so kind and supportive to me and Stephanie. They served us some lunch and then at Stephanie's request sent us to HFC to see the kids. Usually I am thrilled to go there but I was terribly sick and tense about how to handle (and help Stephanie handle) questions about what she was doing back in Haiti. I had made the decision to keep the visit short. The HFC girls and staff screamed and yelled with joy when they saw Stephanie. It was as if she had reached rock star status and everyone just mobbed her the whole time we were there. It would have been sweet except they were so excited to see her but Stephanie chose to pretend she had forgotten all her creole and could only speak English (which is not true). It was very twirpy and I was pretty frustrated that her friends were so happy to see her but she wouldn't communicate with them. At least I didn't have to worry too much about fielding tough questions! We just stayed long enough for Jacques to get out of school and swung by the boys house to get him. Of course the highlight of the day was to see Jacques again! Stephanie with her HFC sisters

We quickly returned back to the office and walked in to see Stephanie, Jude, and Lovenie's Mom waiting in the lobby along with their two little brothers. Stephanie had been super excited to see her Mom again but her Mom pretty much snubbed her. By this time I was so tired and sick that I was shaking and feeling really weak. No fun. We had a bit of a reunion in the office and then Dr. Bernard pulled us all in his office. When it was time to have "the talk" with the Mom the kids were sent back to the lobby. So there I sat just inches from their Mom as Dr. Bernard translated and the story of why we were back in Haiti unfolded. It was so awful. I could tell her Mom was a mix of furious and heartbroken. There were times that she would yell out to Dr. Bernard and it was intense. Whew. Knowing what Stephanie and Jude had shared with me about their Mom I was braced the entire time to defend myself should there be a physical attack. As the details unfolded about what we had learned of Stephanie's past and what was happening in our home things really got ugly. Once it was over we were all called out of the office to celebrate a staff person's birthday. Suddenly we went from this really terrible moment to smiling, singing, and prayer with everyone. It was so tense and awkward. I was so drained that I wanted to just curl up somewhere on the floor.

While we were in the office having this talk Stephanie and Jacques waited in the lobby watching and playing with the little brothers;

While birthday cake was being served I noticed that Stephanie's Mom and Stephanie had disappeared. She had pulled her off alone back into an office. Alarms were going off in my head like crazy. I was so torn between giving a mother and daughter their space and yet not wanting them alone too. I was taking care of the little brothers also so didn't want to walk away from them. I went to Dr. Bernard and shared my concern and asked him to check in on them. He did and came back moments later to tell me they were just talking and that Stephanie's Mom was weeping. I felt a little reassured that maybe everything was okay and this was what they needed but continued to have the feeling that I needed to protect Stephanie. Sadly, I forced myself to ignore it and focused on loving on the little brothers. Something I would later be struggling with guilt about.

The little brothers melted my heart. I just adored them. I learned that they both had been extremely ill. You could see it by looking at them, especially the littlest one. I wanted to just catch a ride to the airport and get on a flight with them but knew it was not possible. It was later that I learned they were starving and being very neglected. They had been brought into the orphanage and placed for adoption several times only to have their Mom return for them and remove them again. They are literally starving to death and have both been seriously ill. There have been many offers of help to their mother and she has refused it all. Learning this did not help the tension already between us.

Little Jason~ What a precious baby. I loved and loved on him while I could. It was so obvious how sick he is. So sad. I just wanted to wrap my arms around him and protect him.

Jacques was amazing with the boys. He's such a sweet and wonderful kid!

(believe it or not, this is the nicest picture I ended up getting of them together)
After Stephanie and her Mom came back out I could tell Stephanie had been crying and was very sad. She became very quiet and refused to talk. Her Mom came storming out and using Jacques to translate started demanding that I get Jude on the phone for her. I refused. I kept trying to get her to stop dragging Jacques in to the middle of it. There was no way I was putting Jude on the phone with her while she was this upset. Later, after learning more, I was so glad I stuck my ground on this one. She then started insisting we adopt Vilner and his brother (again bringing Jacques into it). It was so awkward and so sensitive. I told her that we would not be adopting them. It was so hard to say this as I looked into the faces of these little sick boys. I will be praying for a home for them but for reasons I won't go into... It is not likely to be our home. Things ended on that note. Little Vilner wanted me to hold him and play with him nearly the whole time. When I went to leave he followed me out of the office to the car. When I saw him there I had to pick him up and return him to the office and his Mom. It was very symbolic and I had to hold back sobs as I carried him back in. This was at one time a little boy that was going to become our son and now I had to deliver him back to his Mom.

Soon after we were rushed into the car that would take us to the guest house. Between being ill and the stress of the events that happened... I was totally wiped out. Stephanie cried on the way back but was not ready to talk until days later. It was then that I learned that I should have stuck to my instincts and protected her. The things said to her most certainly were not things that will help her in her healing! There were also threats involved on our family. Sadly, this will likely be the last meeting with their Mom. This makes me so sad as it is not at all what we had hoped for for our children.

It was pretty great to get to sit with Jacques on the way back. For the first time ever though things seemed uncomfortable between us. I couldn't really read what was going on but thought maybe I was misreading things because I was so sick and tired. Sitting on the other side of me was a very hurting Stephanie who I was trying to comfort. Not a day I'd want to live again, that's for sure!

Good News Makes For Good Health

2009-05-23T08:20:00.000-07:00

Proverbs 15:30 A cheerful look brings joy to the heart; good news makes for good health

Last night we celebrated our long awaited good news by dining out at one of our favorite places, then curling up together to watch a funny movie, and ended the day with prayers of thanksgiving! The celebration is sure to continue over this long holiday weekend.

A Celebration Of GREAT News!!!!!

2009-05-22T12:57:00.000-07:00

This morning I was laying in bed nursing a monster of a migraine (I think the travel and the stress caught up to me!) when I began to think about how great God is. The way He placed together every bit of the details of the changes to our family is nothing short of mind boggling and miraculous. As I marveled at this I logged on for a quick email check. Little did I know I was in for a very exciting shock~

When I was in Haiti I was able to spend a lot of time with someone I respect and admire very much, Dr. Bernard, the director of the orphanage that has assisted us with all of our adoptions. I was able to ask him in person for an update on Jacques' paper work. He had to look into it and get back to me. It was Monday morning when I was at the airport with him and Jacques, getting ready to say our goodbyes, when he leaned over to me and whispered to me that he just learned that Jacques file was still stuck in IBESR. My heart sank and disappointed tears formed in my eyes. Moments later I was saying the dreaded goodbyes to our sweet son. Jacques leaned over to me before I left and said "Mom, I want to go with you" and the tears spilled out. I told Jacques that I was going to say my goodbye's quickly and leave only because if I don't I will start bawling and not be able to stop (I know this from experience!). He ignored this and grabbed on to me for a big hug and wouldn't let me go. How wonderful and sad it was at the same time!

So it was to my great shock today when I received an email that we have waited more then 2 years to receive;

Yesterday afternoon Jacques file was signed out of IBESR!!!!! IBESR is the social services of Haiti and they are the ones that review the information that determines if a family can adopt the child or not. The first time we submitted our file to IBESR to adopt Jacques was over 2 years ago when we had to endure the heartbreak of learning that we were denied his adoption. Sad sad time. We were told that they would not approve us until the other children were home. Jacques file was submitted again over 11 months ago and this time we have ourselves an APPROVAL ! Sweet Victory!!! Because of our large family we had to receive a letter of pardon from the president of Haiti to approve us for this adoption so this must have happened already too. Good Good Stuff!!! So, today has become a much needed and long awaited day of celebration. Most of all our thanks goes to the God that makes this all possible in his perfect timing. We are so blessed and honored that He would entrust us with someone as amazing as our dear Jacques to be our son!

Some Last Moments Alone

2009-05-21T20:16:00.000-07:00

Stephanie and I were blessed with some great alone time together as we traveled to Haiti. We had a lot of laughs and hugs~

Miami Airport waiting for our flight to Haiti
Just sitting pretty

A last girls night together in the Miami airport Hotel.

Home Again

2009-05-21T18:06:00.000-07:00

8 days and 8 flights later... I am home! Parts of the trip were very sad and difficult and other parts were the adventure of a lifetime. I am excited to share about the trip but tonight I'm enjoying time with my family. Thanks for covering our travel in your prayers!

A New Beginning

2009-05-11T08:26:00.000-07:00

So our family once again finds it's self moving in a whole new direction then the way we thought things were going to go. We are okay with this because we want God to be our navigator so that we know that the best for everyone will be done. Sometimes it's a painful journey but it's one worth having.

I've been sharing a bit that Stephanie may have a new family to live with and it now has been confirmed. We really couldn't have possibly imagined a family better equipped to take care of, love on, and help Stephanie. They have been missionaries in Haiti for many years and have a great understanding of what kinds of things are happening there, the language, and the culture. They have helped many children and adults in very big ways. Now, they have offered to help Stephanie. They have asked for nothing in return but to be able to serve God by helping her! The tough part is that they live in Haiti, so Stephanie will be returning there. While she was not thrilled about it at first she is accepting it now. She will only be there for 2.5 months and then will return to America for a few months with her new family. She will likely travel back and forth between the two countries quite a bit. What adventures she will have!

Early Thursday morning Stephanie and I will board a plane and start our trip to Haiti together. We will arrive on Friday morning and hope to be able to see her friends, Mom, and little brothers. She is VERY excited about that part of the trip. We will also be able to spend those days with our son, Jacques, that we are in the process of adopting! On Monday we will board a plane to the other side Haiti and stay a few days with her new family and new home. I'll help her get settled in and then fly out on Thursday, arriving home Friday.

What an emotional trip this will be. Stephanie and I have become very close since she moved out. To have her so far away will be very hard. We are so thankful she will be with such good people and getting help. I'm likely to return home having shed an ocean of tears. First will be the always gut-wrenching goodbye to Jacques, then again a few days later with Stephanie. One child I will leave behind because I have no choice, the other out of choice. I'm not sure which feels worse. Yuck, I can hardly stand to think of it. :(

Some very positive news is that this family has offered to take Stephanie in as guardians of her so that we do not have to disrupt the adoption! We will continue on as her legal parents. What we are all hopeful will happen is that Stephanie will get the help she needs and can safely return to our family one day.

We thank God for providing in every way during this time. Now I must trust that he will provide me with the strength I will need to take this trip and do what needs to be done.

Giving Her Back To You

2009-05-07T07:41:00.000-07:00

Today could be a day that changes our family's future. Pretty big deal! It's also been a very emotional time and requiring some major decisions~ which means we've been praying lots. Here is the good news... God keeps confirming again and again that this is all part of His plan and we need to trust Him in it all.

My bible reading today hit so at home with what is happening;

1 Samuel 1-8 tells of a woman named Hannah that is heartbroken because she is unable to have a baby. While I can't so much relate to the pain of infertility I can relate to the tears shed for over 3 years while we waited to bring our adopted children home.

9-18 Hannah cries out to the Lord begging for her child. I cried out for years begging for our children.

19-20 Hannah immediately becomes pregnant and has the child, Samuel, she has longed for for so long! Just as our children were at last sent home to us. I can comprehend the unbelievable joy she experienced to know that her dream had at last been fulfilled.

21-27 Hannah keeps Samuel with her until he is weaned. Can you imagine in that time the bond and love she would have felt for this long awaited child? Once weaned she keeps her promise to the Lord and "gives her child back to Him". She takes him to be raised in the tabernacle where he will grow to know and serve God and be used greatly by him.

God Please give me the strength to be willing to say, like Hannah, that I give your child back to you to do your will in her life. May it lead to a future for her of serving you.

1 Samuel 2; 1

Then Hannah prayed;

"My heart rejoices in the Lord. The Lord has made me strong."

My heart does rejoice in knowing He has a great plan for our daughter, even while it breaks at knowing what we must do. I can see how it would make me stronger, like Hannah, to wait so long and love so much just to say goodbye.

These next few days are likely to be pretty tough. We would appreciate your prayers for wisdom as we sort out the details.

Relax Man

2009-05-05T16:32:00.001-07:00

Every time I use a hair relaxer on the kids I'm just in awe of how different it makes their hair. I wish I could find something that I could put in my hair and make it several inches longer in just minutes. Oh, yeah, I guess we've all got a shot at extensions!

LOVE these darling kids!

Miracles, Joy, and Tears

2009-05-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

Life continues to move forward EXACTLY the way God planned for it to all along. It's a very cool thing to get to see and recognize God at work in a situation that otherwise would seem so hopeless. Yet, He continues to amaze us. We have been praying for a miracle and it is starting to look like we may be seeing an answer to that prayer. Because nothing is definite quite yet I'll withhold the details for now.

It is a seriously EMOTIONAL time. Whew! When going into our adoptions we never for a moment imagined it to turn out any other way then to be a lifetime of our children in our home with our family. Due to the circumstances we may be saying a very difficult goodbye very soon. There just are no words for how sad that makes me. While she will not be by any means out of our lives, she may be very far away from us. The floodgates of tears just keep coming.

While seeking God through this tough time He kept telling me again and again that this is just something that must happen for His plan to be fulfilled in Stephanie's life. It has been a truly great honor to be used by God in any way He chooses to use us. We will always be thankful that God would allow us any role in His plan for Stephanie's life. It may not be what WE thought it was going to be but God keeps reminding me:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are my ways your ways."

I wouldn't want it any other way. So today maybe I shed a lot of tears over things not being what we had dreamed they would be but I will also be thanking God for so many things. Thankful for His faithfulness, for guiding us and helping us, the kindness and love of others, and so much more.

We ask for your continued prayers especially for Stephanie. We know God has great big wonderful plans for her life!

Spring Fling Dance

2009-05-02T08:29:00.001-07:00

Last night we took our kids to their first ever dance! What a blast we had with them!!! So fun that they are not yet "too cool" to dance with their Mom and Dad. The dance was for home schooling families. I think going to it reconfirmed my positive thinking about home schooling. It was pretty well attended and 90% of the people there were on the dance floor all night. The feel of the party was just plain fun. Kids of all ages were dancing together, laughing, and having a good time. I saw zero bad attitudes, unkindness, or self conciseness. Just a bunch of well adjusted and kind kids having a great time with each other and even with THEIR PARENTS! ;)

Pre-Party Photos:

Lovable Luke
This is the most he moved all night.

Sweet dear Johnny

Charming Kyle

Darling Jude

Adorable Lovebug

The Boy Pack

The Gang

Party Time:

Yep, This is pretty much what Luke did the whole time.

Johnny doesn't mess around~ he's here to DANCE

Kyle hams it up for the camera

Lovenie was the biggest littlest party girl there. She was dancing all over that hall. She would even find people forming circles and bust through to dance in the middle of them all~ much to the delight of everyone. She can really get down!

Go Lovenie, Go Lovenie

Jude started out a bit shy and reserved but every now and then would bust a major move. He sure can dance!

Despite his fun hamming it up moves Kyle was in quite the demand with the ladies/girls last night. He's such a little charmer.

Just Sweet

Post Party:

She's Just THAT Cute

2009-04-30T15:02:00.001-07:00

Have I mentioned lately how much I enjoy having a little girl? It's all I thought it would be and so much more! I've really enjoyed dolling her up each morning for school. This morning I couldn't resist a little photo shoot. Can you see how happy she is? Happy happy little girl.

Yesterday we had a really fantastic time at a birthday party for a sweet friend with Down Syndrome. There were a total of 6 children at the party with DS and every single one of them were so cheery and enjoyable. There is so much we could learn from them.

Tomorrow night we plan to take the kids to a Home school Spring Dance. It will be the first ever dance party for all our kids and they are super excited!

Curses and Blessings

2009-04-30T09:20:00.000-07:00

"The Bible calls debt a curse and children a blessing; but in our culture, we apply for a curse and reject blessings. [Doug Phillips]

Thing 3

2009-04-28T16:31:00.001-07:00

Could someone please alert Dr. Suess that we have found and captured Thing 3. We will keep her here until he can come around to collect her.

Boys Night/Girls Night Out

2009-04-28T15:46:00.000-07:00

Fierce Pirate Jude

Friday was dress like a pirate day at Jude's school followed by a boys night out pirate party. Since I'm still among the "girls" I was uninvited. ;) Jim rounded up our four boys and they headed out for their first boys only outing. They had such a great time at the party!

Lovenie and I couldn't just sit around at home while the boys were out having their fun so the two of us headed out for our own special girls night. We went out to eat and then shopping. Lovenie was just so darling and enjoyable.

Sometimes in the craziness of life it is so easy to lose sight of what a joy our children are. Last night I was helping Jude with his homework when it spiralled into some sort of silly conversation which then spiralled into serious and heartfelt talks. He made me laugh, he made me nearly cry, you name it! What was sweet was just listening to him and marveling at how amazing he is. It's nice to shove aside the busyness and just "SEE" these great kids. Hopefully this will lead to many more boys/girls nights out and remind me to slow down and enjoy these little treasures in our home.

More Changes Then A Newborn Baby

2009-04-27T18:03:00.000-07:00

At least that is what things seem like around here. Yesterday we learned that Stephanie's host family is having a very big change in their family too and can no longer keep Stephanie with them. We have been given one months notice to find alternative plans. Today I sent a bio and photo of her to an organization that helps connect families with a child for adoption and families looking to adopt. With Stephanie's age and issues she certainly is not an easy placement but we continue to hold out hope that there has to be a family somewhere out there that will give Stephanie the chance that she needs.

Today I went to pick up Lovenie from preschool and our car would not start. Problem is... I let some of our children stay home while I went to pick her up. It was the first time I let them stay while I went to get her so wouldn't ya know this would happen? It seems that our car key and our ignition are no longer friendly. It is now 6 hours later and we are still working on it. Poor Jim had to come rescue me and Lovenie so we could get back to the boys and now will be at work until late making up for lost time.

Please continue praying for Stephanie, passing on the info about adopting her, and sending me any ideas you might have!

Lovenie Goes To School

2009-04-21T20:42:00.000-07:00

Today was a big day for our baby girl! Today she had her first day of speech therapy preschool. It was my first experience of letting my "baby" go to school. Now I get what all the talk is about. I sat her down at the table and said goodbye and she looked sad and wouldn't talk to me~ break my heart! Of course by the time I picked her up she was all cheery and can't wait to go back tomorrow.

Yesterday we had an IEP meeting for her. This is when I learned the results of all the testing they had done for her. I'm thrilled to share that she tested at a 24 month level. This is great considering how far she's come in such a short time.

When did our baby get so grown up???

Pizza Parlor Hoppin'

2009-04-20T17:34:00.001-07:00

Have you ever just really craved something specific and nothing else will do? This happened on Saturday night when I just had my heart, and stomach, set on a gooey pizza from a new favorite pizza place. We tried to call and have delivery but no one would answer the phone. Whew, they are usually very busy but not so much that they don't answer the phone. We were not to be detoured so we jumped in the car to head to the pizza parlor. When we got there we found that the electricity was out. BUMMED we drove away and found another pizza joint we had not tried before. Reluctantly we went ahead and ordered. The pizza was sad, oh so very sad. While at that pizza place we called the other place and learned that they were open again so we placed our order and finished up our very sad pizza and off we went to the parlor we really wanted. Going from one pizza place to another was a first for us but BOY was it worth it!

It has been H~O~T here. Saturday we had our first swim day of the season. Our new pool is heated just right and was wonderful. Sunday we returned for round two of splashy fun. Also on Sunday Jim's brother came over and helped us build some storage crates in our back yard. Our kids just LOVE their Uncle Matt. The boys and I helped a little and then left Jim and Matt to the hard, hot labor while we ran off to the pool. Three cheers for our heroes Jim and Matt!!!

Lovenie goes through phases at the pool~

Phase 1~ Sassy, silly, and on the move

Phase 2~ Fading fast

Phase 3~ ZZZZZZZ

Tomorrow is a very BIG day for a certain little darling girl. Details tomorrow!

First Easter In America

2009-04-13T10:23:00.001-07:00

We couldn't ask for a more beautiful first Easter with our children!

Below is a photo of the baskets and gifts we put together for our kids and nephews. Instead of Easter Eggs we made resurrection gifts with tissue paper and ribbons. Not because we are so very creative and clever, but because we are the definition of procrastination and all plastic Easter eggs had been sold out of the stores by the time we went looking for them. The eggs would certainly be easier but the resurrection gifts (as we named them) are just beautiful. Maybe it will be a new tradition?

Bring on the kids!
The gifts were met with much glee.

Lovenie receives her first ever bible

After gifts it was time to scramble around and get everyone ready for church. Our service was held outdoors in a park. Jim and I sat in lawn chairs while our children laid out in the sun in front of us. It was a sweet time.

Followed by a picnic and egg hunt`

Jude enjoyed his first Easter egg hunt. He excitedly showed me his huge full bag. I reminded him to make sure that the littler kids found them too. He went back and gave away nearly every single one of his eggs to little kids. So sweet! Then later when Luke's bag tore open Jude offered him his.

Searching for reserrection gifts at home~

After church we returned home for a super great celebration with Jim's sister and family. It is so great living near them now and it was fun to be spend the evening with them. It made it all the more special for our family.

Our handsome and sweet nephews are so fun to be with. One of them even collected the resurrection gifts for Lovenie while she napped.

Lovenie ends out the night with some sass.

I had a long phone chat with Stephanie on Saturday night. Her foster parents had taken her to a dramatic Easter play. She loved it so much that they found friends to take her back to it a second time in the same day. I had gone by the group home to see her and leave her a gift but she was away at the play. Knowing the family that she spent her first American Easter with, I am certain she had a very special one! It was strange to not be able to include her on our family celebration but this is just the kind of thing we will have to get used to.

Overall, a really memorable and fantastic day!

Many Changes

2009-04-09T08:49:00.000-07:00

So it has been a little over a week since Stephanie has been out of our home and I think maybe I might be ready to share an update. Whew... things have been so heartbreaking around here. We find ourselves in that place of having to totally rely on God to get us through it.

Stephanie is currently at a Christian Therapeutic Group Home. She is safe and is with a couple (without children in the home) that is very kind to her but strict as well. This couple is such an answer to prayers. She is very homesick and wants to come back home to us but we can not and will not let that happen any time soon (if ever). Please continue to pray for her and pray for our hearts as we struggle with our relationship with her. This group home is likely a very temporary situation as it is costing us thousands a month. Not something, short of a miracle, that we can do for long. Ideally we would still like to find her a family that would be willing to adopt her through adoption disruption. We think she would thrive best in a home where there would not be young or mentally disabled children. If we cannot find her a home we may be left with little option and have to allow CPS to take over. :(

Now that she is out of the home Lovenie seems to have let the floodgates of pain open. She does not speak much (because of the stroke) but communicates by words as much as she can and the rest she communicates with dolls and pointing. Please please pray for Lovenie as she is for the first time grieving what has been happening to her.

The whole thing is just really sad! It is so hard to comfort Lovenie by day and then in the evenings talk with Stephanie and comfort and encourage her too. We know what has happened has been a result of so much pain in her life too. Some days it is easy to extend her grace and other days I struggle with anger and not wanting to be in a situation where I have to talk with her. I had a very honest talk with her about this recently and told her that some days we can talk but there will be other days she'll just have to give me some space to work through this all too.

It's still a very dark time with a lot of unknowns. I keep trying to cling to the fact that God made it clear that He already has it figured out but it is so easy to slip back into fear or trying to "solve" it all myself.

Now some positives~ While I was away at the retreat Jim went into Lovenie and Stephanie's room and removed all of Stephanie's things. Jim had Lovenie give him input and was so sensitive about making sure she was okay with what he was doing. He then set the room up to surround her with things that are only for HER. Stressing that this is only her room now. She smiled and clapped her hands and has been spending so much time in there. The way he did it and the sensitivity he used makes me so very proud of my husband.

I keep watching and waiting for Jude to start acting out over all that is happening. He has not. He has been a real joy and does not seem to be taking it all too hard. He says he understands why his sister had to go somewhere else and he is protective over Lovenie. Honestly, there has been a real peace in our home when we are not in the thick moments of dealing with the issues. I had not realized how much stress we had been under for the last 8 months until Stephanie was gone. It makes me sad to realize how much tension our family had been living with each day, and worse, how much fear our children were living with. The overall reaction from all the kids seems to be one of great relief.

We have never been in a situation like this and are constantly asking ourselves if we are handling it well and making good decisions. It's so tough. No one can tell us what to do~ it is for us to work through while trusting in God to lead us through it. I know there are times that we probably say or do the wrong things but we can only pray that God will smooth it over and help us continue on.

Really?

2009-04-08T10:23:00.000-07:00

Ah the joys of living with a son with mild autism. No, seriously... he's such a joy! He says the most off the wall things and does it with the funniest faces. He really cracks us up. Unfortunately autism has a repetitive and sometimes annoying side. Johnny goes through phases that he says the same thing over and over again. One of my favorites was his phase that to everything we asked him he would answer with an exaggerated tone and say "I have COMPLETE no idea!" This one has given us many laughs and although he has moved on from it Jim and I still jokingly say it about things. Now he has moved onto asking us "Really?" to EVERYTHING we say.

Us~ "It's time to eat."
Johnny~ "Really?"
Me~ "Johnny you forgot to put away your dishes."
Johnny "Really?".

On and on this goes. It totally amuses me. I laugh in my head right now at it as I think of how much his response echo's exactly how I feel. I feel like saying to God "Really?" to everything happening in our lives. Some of the things we are experiencing seems so surreal because you never really think you will find yourself in this place. I've found myself asking Jim "Is this really happening?" "Is this really our life right now?"

A little ode today to the word REALLY!

It Rains Harder On Me

2009-04-07T15:22:00.000-07:00

After enjoying a gorgeous sunny day yesterday it is now cold and pouring down rain today~ hailing even. The kids and I stood at the window in awe watching it pour down. It was all fun and games until I realized "OH NO" I left one of the windows in the car open. I grab a jacket and throw it over my head without even bothering to put it on. Out in the storm I went yelling "BRRRRRR" the whole time. I got the window closed and ran back to the house. Just as soon as I was indoors the rain let up and became a drizzle. Me and the kids laughed about it. I asked them if they thought I make it rain harder and when they all said yes we decided to test it. So I threw the jacket back overhead and out again I ran. Sure enough, once I was outdoors again it started raining harder. I'm indoors again now and there is nearly no rain. Weird right? If anyone has any big outdoor events you need it to not rain for just give me a call and I'll make sure to stay in that day.

This morning I was doing our start of the school day prayer with the boys. Afterwards Johnny looked out the window at the rain and said very matter of factly "A 100% chance of rain today". He's a genius alright!

I've Been A Silly Silly Girl

2009-04-06T11:55:00.001-07:00

I have returned home from one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen~ Lake Tahoe. I was able to rest, read, and worship. I spent precious alone time with God and was able to just be still and really HEAR Him and feel his presence. So Great!

The last few days leading up to the retreat were not so great. Now that Stephanie is out of the home Lovenie has felt safe to tell us what has been happening. Have you ever thought it might be possible that your heart could actually shatter from aching? I held her while she chattered and cried. I listened when she talked without asking more then she wanted to tell or trying to distract her. It occurred to me that this precious little girl has never had anyone to protect her, hear her, and hold her while she cries. I'm determined to do all I can to end that here and now. Once she would go back happily about her play I would be free to go to my room and sob and sob. Then I had to deal with some feelings of anger about it all. It wasn't pretty. On top of all of that the heavy stress about what to do about the situation we are now in has been nearly unbearable. The thoughts of what we should do now and how to help everyone had consumed my every waking thought.

This weekend I got alone with God and He gently told me that I am being a silly silly girl. What do I think I can accomplish with all my efforts? I could never heal the hurt in our children. I could never personally figure out an answer an how to handle this all. Then He hit me with the whopper~~~ It is not my problem to solve! What? It sure feels like our problem to solve, but it is not and has never been. This has been God's show all along. He already has the answer and will reveal it to us when it is time. All He asks of us is to have a willing heart to do whatever part of it He calls us to. God brought my attention to this verse: "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," Says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher then the earth, So are my ways higher then your ways, And my thoughts then your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9

Knowing this is the truth WHY would I even try to come up with my own plan? I need to step back and remember that I was never intended to control the situation. Whew, What a huge relief that is!

He also brought my attention to: The chastisement for our Peace was upon Him and by His stripes we are HEALED. Isaiah 53:5 This is a verse I've heard many times before but it took on new meaning to me. Not just healed from our sins but healed from ALL things that sin creates. It was a sweet promise to cling to that God is at work in Stephanie and I believe with all my heart He will heal the many hurts that has been done to her. She will come out of this stronger, more compassionate, and more loving. All that was intended to harm her will be healed and what was intended for bad will be used for good. Our little ones at home will heal as well. How do I know? All the sin that created the pain has already been paid for and defeated. Cool thing right???

For my children God has shared with me;
Great shall be the peace of your children. Isaiah 54:13

And for myself;
For you shall go out with joy, And be led out with peace

Joy and peace while being led. That works for me!!

Retreat

2009-04-02T22:55:00.000-07:00

Because I managed to snag the world's greatest husband~ Jim will be taking the day off of work tomorrow and sending me away for a 3 day women's retreat with our new church. I won't really know anyone yet but that doesn't bother me much as I love to meet new people. The timing is so perfect and a retreat is just what the Dr. (as in the Great Physician) ordered.

Things continue to be sad around here and probably will be for quite a while. We just keep praying for a miracle. We try very hard not to let it take our lives over and leave us unable to enjoy anything. We are determined to laugh and love too.

I'll be back soon and hopefully come home refreshed and recharged!

Got Me

2009-04-02T09:11:00.000-07:00

Some of you that are my friends every day of the year EXCEPT on
April 1st will be very happy to know that I was pranked good yesterday. Jim made a good attempt but it didn't work. Then at night I went upstairs to brush my teeth and when I turned on the water it went every which way except down! I looked at it and found cling wrap had been strategically wrapped around the nozzle and tied down. I went down stairs and told Jim good job for finally getting me. He said he didn't do it, I insisted he must of and asked if he was April fooling me by denying it. He then asked me if I was April fooling him by saying it was done and he did it. Around and around like this we went (we trust each other every day but this day). It wasn't until morning when we learned it was JUDE!!! Way to go Jude. I'm awfully proud of him and look forward to seeing what he will come up with next year.

Eggs And Beans In My Purse

2009-04-01T08:57:00.000-07:00

Aw, it is one of my favorite days of the year. I LOVE April fools day. A day for totally silliness. This morning I woke up early and while everyone slept I took everything out of Jude's backpack and wrapped each item in tinfoil. Then I put them all together in a bundle and wrapped it all with cling wrap, along with a note that said Happy April Fools Day. Then I moved on to Jim's Laptop case where everything (including his wallet) got the tinfoil treatment. I put cling wrap under the toilet seats to catch peep on unsuspecting morning peepers and did all sorts of other little pranks. When Jim was awake I took him into the boys room with me to watch while I very carefully used red lip liner to draw on mustaches and beards. ;) I couldn't believe I managed to get them all without them figuring out what I was doing!

I'm not all pranks and mean, I'm silly too. On April Fools day we eat our meals backwards. This morning we had dinner for breakfast~ spaghetti and fresh out of the oven brownies. The kids LOVE doing this but nervously checked all their food and drinks because they were so sure I did something to them. Jim discovered his tin wrapped laptop case before leaving and the kids all had a good laugh that I got their Dad. When Jim was leaving I smiled sweetly at Jim and told him to have a nice drive to work. Everyone looked at each other and then ran outside to see what I did to the car. Jim got in very cautiously and his parting words were "You didn't cut the brakes did you?". After he left the kids all asked me what I did and I told them the truth. I did NOTHING. But it's fun to imagine Jim cautiously driving all the way to work. ;)

The kids keep trying to get me back and have pulled over some little tricks on me. This morning I opened my purse and found all sorts of strange things. Toys, a tinfoil wrapped camera, and A CAN OF BEANS!! I thought this was all funny until I found that everything in my purse was STICKY. That's when I learned that one of the kids thought it would be funny to place an egg in my purse too. Only problem is that they accidentally broke the egg while putting it in there! We had a nice little chat about the rules about pranks~ no hurting or angering anyone, and no damaging things (like say, egg on my checks, cards, pictures, etc!!!). It's been a fun morning and the fun is sure to continue. I'll be thinking up new pranks as the day goes on. Tonight we will be having breakfast for dinner.

On a not as funny update~ As of yesterday Stephanie is not in the home with us. We have her in a temporary situation that we think is an answer to our prayers. I'll update more later but today we just need rest, prayer time, and then we will move on to making some serious decisions.